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Why Wouldn’t Dennis Rodman be Coaching a Topless Women’s Basketball Team?

Dennis Rodman could shock the world by doing any one of a number of things: not coloring his hair, not getting anything pierced, showering, etc. The flip side of that coin, though, is that Rodman has carved out a certain pop culture niche for himself as a doer of atypical (for the rest of humanity), crazy things. And as a constant doer of crazy things, he’s raised the bar for achievable craziness so high that even he can’t meet the requirements for noteworthy behavior anymore.

Rodman’s most recent Rodman-esque endeavor, as reported by the good folks at Yahoo! Sports, is going to be coaching a topless women’s basketball team in New York City. Apparently, the former Chicago Bulls star will aim to pull an assortment of qualified chicas together for a squad comprised of strippers from Headquarters Gentleman Club. The lovely ladies selected by Rodman will then compete against another group of topless strippers in what Rodman is calling a charity basketball game.

The details for this magical event are scarce at this point, but the world will no doubt wait with bated breath. Meanwhile, we at Opposing Views have decided to give Rodman some extra ideas with which he can spice this charitable event up:

  • Have the boys from TNT (Ernie, Charles, Kenny and Shaq) do their usual shtick before and after the game as they would any other day – but topless.
  • Make sure Marv Albert isn’t scheduled to do this game. You know why.
  • Send repeated reminder notices to David Kahn to set the parental control for Ricky Rubio’s TV.
  • Don’t invite Kobe Bryant. He probably knows most of these girls.
  • Same goes for Jerry Buss.
  • Have them play up to 18. Also, make sure they’re all at least 18.

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