Usually I would paraphrase the article and include only key parts, but this article needs to be left in its entirety to get the full effect.
Amar’e Stoudemire is in incredible shape, even by NBA standards. He’s a 6-foot-1o mass of tightly wound muscle covered in muscles, and the kind of guy who will jump naked in to a swimming pool for a magazine cover, just because he wants to show off. At one point, he claimed to have just 2 percent body fat while weighing 245 pounds. In a league full of incredible athletes in extraordinary condition, Amar’e Stoudemire is one of the most fit.
Glen Davis is not. Just ask Amar’e, who’s using Big Baby’s bigness against him. From the New York Post:
Asked about his second-quarter post defense, Stoudemire said: “I’m just playing smart. I know ‘Baby’ wanted to try to draw contact and draw fouls. His core is not really as tight as it should be, so I knew I can catch him off-balance from that. I kind of backed up, but I thought he traveled on the play, but he turned the ball over.”
Killer fat joke, Amar’e. “His core is not really as tight as it should be” is the new “You want your belt to buckle, not the chair,” which was the new “He’s so fat, when he sits around the house, he sits around the house.” Just an insta-classic zing that should definitely be included whenever they reissue “Snaps.”
This crack is the latest in the least memorable war of words in playoff basketball history. Since Sunday’s Game 1, these two have been saying how easy it is to guard the other one, but tempering those criticisms tempered with praise. Kinda weird to say you’re better than someone, only to follow it up by commenting on how great they are, but that’s exactly what both of these guys are doing.
However, maybe this changes things. Maybe Amar’e taking a shot at Davis’ gut sets something off in Celtics big man. If so, might I suggest mentioning Amar’e’s women’s fashion line, his friendship with Anna Wintour or how silly he looks in a hat? Definitely some material to work with there.