Note: we are republishing this story to raise awareness about body shaming and the damage it can cause to people’s mental health.
Brittaney Lynn Shane tried to be a good girlfriend but her boyfriend never seemed to be satisfied, eventually dumping her.
He told her that she “didn’t look good with long hair” and that he “preferred girls with short hair,” so she kept her hair cut above her shoulders. He laughed at her when she dyed her hair red, telling her that she looked ridiculous. So she dyed it back to blonde a week later. She stopped wearing makeup because he complained that she wore too much, even though it was just winged eyeliner and mascara for the most part.
He called her tattoos and piercings “tacky and ugly,” going so far as to try and take out her belly button ring every time he saw it. She removed her piercings and stopped getting tattoos.
He turned his attention to her stretch marks, pointing them out every chance he got, forcing her to keep trying to hide them. She started eating less every day after he repeatedly commented about her weight.
In her open letter, Brittaney wrote: “You pointed out every single flaw I had. So I lost every bit of confidence I had.”
He then dumped her for a “younger, prettier girl,” who he could mold and shape into what he wanted just like he had tried to do with her, Brittaney wrote.
“For almost two years you had me convinced that you were out of my league and that I just wasn’t good enough the way I was. I did everything I could to be what you wanted. I did everything you told me to do. It still wasn’t good enough,” she wrote.
She admitted to blaming herself for everything after the breakup. “You blamed me too,” Brittaney wrote.
She finally saw the truth: “You weren’t out of my league. I was out of yours. I wasn’t the one who wasn’t good enough for you. You were the one who wasn’t good enough for me. You couldn’t accept me for who I was. When I took you the way you were. Your many many many flaws and everything else that was there. The only time I ever asked you to change was when I asked you to show me you actually cared about me. Which you never did.”
Finally seeing things for how they were, she began doing things that made her happy and embraced who she was as a person. She posted a photo of her new hairdo: “Here I am a few months later. My hair is past my shoulders. My hair is bright red.”
She began putting on makeup and got a new tattoo. “I still have stretch marks,” she said, adding that she’s eating what she wants and is happy and healthy at 135 pounds.
“I finally see myself looking back at me when I look in the mirror. Not the girl you had created. You have your life. Your new love. Your side of our story. But you no longer have me. Not in any way, shape, or form,” she wrote. “It’s so hard for me to come out about this and admit that I became so vulnerable because of one guy. Something I always said would never happen. It’s humiliating to even think about how low I got. But what gives me the guts to come out about this is the fact that I overcame it and I’m finally back to who I really am.”