An ill-advised kick during a professional wrestling match has landed both participants out of the ring and into a courtroom.
On Monday, John Miller, a pro wrestler who took part in a Coliseum Championship Wrestling event last June, filed suit against his opponent Clinton “Guido Andretti” Woosley, as well as Coliseum Championship Wrestling and its promoter, Sam Cosby. According to the News and Tribune (via Deadspin), Miller is alleging that because of an errant kick to the groin by Woosley during their showdown last year, his entire career is now in serious jeopardy.
Per Miller’s take on what transpired: last June he and Woosley participated in a standard, run-of-the-mill, predetermined result wrestling match. As noted in a press release from his attorney: “Professional wrestling is like a choreographed dance or physical theater. Wrestlers know who the winner is going to be before they enter the ring and it’s their job to agree upon the dance that will get the result.” Unfortunately, Woosley allegedly didn’t stick to the dance moves that were originally discussed.
Instead of staying true to the script, Woosley purportedly threw an unplanned kick into Miller’s groin that caused severe damage to his right testicle. Eventually, Miller had to have that testicle removed.
“Guido (Woosley) refused to accept the predetermined result and decided to deviate from the script and actually did something that is unacceptable in the industry, violently kicked John in his manhood,” Miller’s lawyer pointed out, in the world’s greatest press release.
To add insult to injury, because Miller didn’t have health insurance, he now owes more than $20,000 for a surgery that eliminated one of his testicles.
Via the News and Tribune:
“He does not have the money, nor should he have to pay for the surgery,” Wilder said.
Further, he said that the loss of the testicle will result in a lack of testosterone, which could lead to the onset of arthritis, loss of sex drive, difficulty procreating and loss of muscle mass.
The suit was filed in Clark Circuit Court No. 4 and names Woosley, Coliseum Championship Wrestling and its promoter, Sam Cosby. Wilder was called for additional comment but could not be reached by press time. It’s unclear how much Miller is seeking in damages.
At the end of the day, while we don’t know what sort of payout Miller will ultimately get, it’s probably safe to assume that it won’t be equal to what he valued his right testicle at. And not to doubt the legitimacy of Coliseum Championship Wrestling or anything, but it’s hard to envision them having enough dough in the bank to really compensate Miller for his loss the way he probably deserves to be compensated.
The lesson here: don't become a pro wrestler if you value your testicles.
(Kudos to Deadspin)