This is a weekly free therapy session I provide for not only myself, but for all football fans. If you’re looking for politically correct, mainstream, polite, NFL content, you’ve come to the wrong place.
In fact, on any given week you should be prepared to either agree with me or be offended, belittled, shocked, and insulted. You can expect to find anger, sarcasm, foul language (I will do my best to refrain), and whatever the hell else I’m feeling come 1 am CST Tuesday mornings this NFL season. So, lie down on your couch and grab your tissue because your NFL Week 5 session has begun…….
They say that there’s 3 things guaranteed in this life, 1) Death 2) Taxes & 3) A Ryan saying something that will bite them in the ass. Sunday morning in my piece, NFL Game Previews Week 4: Easy Like Sunday Morning”, that if Calvin Johnson torched the Dallas Cowboys on Sunday, you could bet there would be a special place for Rob Ryan in “NFL Rage”. Well, does 8 catches for 96 yards and 2 touchdowns count?
Rob Ryan decided to say this about the NFL’s Top wide receiver, (Yes, Calvin Johnson has passed Andre Johnson in my opinion) the week he was to face him, “We work against better receivers with Miles Austin and Dez Bryant”. Ok, I understand that you want to talk up your guys, but this isn’t the way to do it. This comes off as a shot to the best in the business on what happens to be THE WEEK YOU PLAY HIM!!!
I’m all for Dez Bryant. I think he’s the best young, receiver in the game, but he also has to stay healthy and mature. Calvin Johnson has been doing this at a high level for quite some time now and finally has a quality, healthy quarterback to throw him the ball, while he’s in the prime of his career. How dare Ryan put Miles Austin, anywhere near the same category of a receiver as Calvin Johnson. That’s like comparing a Ryan coach to Vince Lombardi or a Kardashian to anyone who’s STD free.
Ryan went on to add this gem, “I know he’s on some touchdown thing like that, whatever.” Yes Robbie, his touchdown thing was tying the record of games in a row with at least three touchdowns per game, which he added to against your defense by the way….. Going into the matchup with Ryan’s defense, he was tied with three straight games with two touchdowns in each. Thanks to Rob Ryan’s defense, he now holds the record by himself. Here’s the video evidence of how he got it on Rob’s boys. I wonder which catch Ryan liked better? The one with two defenders hanging all over him and a third running over or the one that won the game?
Good thing this wasn’t “Transformers 4″ or Megatron would have just destroyed all of us, thanks to Optimus PrimeRib’s fat ass weak protection.