This is a weekly free therapy session I provide for not only myself, but for all football fans. If you’re looking for politically correct, mainstream, polite, NFL content, you’ve come to the wrong place. In fact, on any given week you should be prepared to either agree with me or be offended, belittled, shocked, and insulted.
You can expect to find anger, sarcasm, foul language (I will do my best to refrain), and whatever the hell else I’m feeling come 1 am CST Tuesday mornings this NFL season. So, lie down on your couch and grab your tissue because your NFL Week 8 session has begun…….
- NFL Rage: Dallas is Playing Russian Roulette with Dez Bryant’s Health
- NFL Rage: The Nutcracker Play Comes Two Months Early
- Dolphins Head Coach Tony Sparano Begs for His Job
Quite a few quarterbacks have regressed during the 2011 season, and perhaps none more so than Philip Rivers. I’ve always stated that Rivers needed LaDainian Tomlinson and Antonio Gates to be a quality quarterback, but after LT left and Rivers kept producing, I quit buying what I was selling.
Now that Darren Sproles has departed, what I saw the first few years is back and more than apparent for everyone with two eyes. When Rivers is at his best, he’s checking down to his speedy backs and finding Gates all over the field. This pulls defenses up and then he can simply chuck the ball deep down field in one on one coverage’s and allow his 6’5 receivers to go up and beat the 5’10 cornerbacks. Teams aren’t respecting the underneath these days and are allowed to sit back in coverage this year. This is what Philip Rivers looks like without a dynamic receiver coming out of the backfield.
The problem on Sunday however had more to do with the end of the game then what got the Chargers in that predicament. San Diego got the ball back late in the game and needed to move down the field at a brisk pace to have a shot at the winning touchdown, but it never had a chance. Rivers led the slowest paced final drive in NFL history taking 5-yard check downs that didn’t stand a chance at getting out of bounds without any sense of urgency of getting to play in and getting to the line.
I’m guessing Philip’s favorite story as a child was the slow and steady tortoise that beat the fast hare. Parents please cover your kids’ eyes (Philip you can close yours too) because I have news for all. Santa Clause doesn’t exist and neither does the Easter Bunny. Men don’t really fall for women at first for their personality and moving at a slow pace has never been successful for anyone other than old people with regard to their car insurance premiums.
This was the most painful 2-minute drill I’ve ever seen. It was like watching a crippled kid run a race around a track in a stadium in dead last place. Then the kid gets shot, run over by a car, and finally say says “eff’ this” throwing his shoes 15 yards deep in the stands.
On the 4th down play Rivers looked to convert and keep the game alive but he threw the ball out of bounds!
Memo to Philip Rivers
If you are trying to come from behind, when trying to convert a 4th down with no time-outs and time running out in the game you have the following acceptable options.
- A) Take a shot down field and hope for a miracle.
- B) Complete pass towards sideline past the first down marker that allows receiver to get out of bounds and extend the game.
- C) Either A or B
- D) Just about anything in an attempt to extend the game giving your team another opportunity to score.
Philip, throwing the ball out of bounds effectively ending the game is not an acceptable option. To be honest, throwing the ball to Darrelle Revis would have been a better option. At least if you did that did that Philip, the play would have continued and there was a hypothetical chance that Revis may have fumbled and the Chargers could have recovered it for a first down or run it in for a touchdown.
Throwing the ball out of bounds was a kin to kneeling on the ball or punting it back to the Jets. Philip not only doesn’t know his nursery rhymes, but he gave up during the game; two traits that are simply un-American.