In a thought-provoking new post for the blog We Are Glory, Steven Nelms presented an argument to husbands and fathers everywhere, explaining why they can’t afford their wives as a stay-at-home mother.
Nelms and his wife, Glory, got married three years ago and are now the parents to a 2-year-old boy named Ezra. Following Ezra’s birth, Nelms explained in the blog post that the couple realized that it wasn’t financially sensible for Glory to return to work considering the cost of childcare.
"With childcare costs it would’ve been a wash with her income at best," he said. "So we decided that she would stay home as long as it made sense." The decision was one that was not made lightly, as Glory had been working since she was 14 years old. “It has always been part of her, especially since she began contributing to the financial needs of her family by 17 years old,” he wrote. “So getting a paycheck was a significant part of feeling valued and appreciated for all the hard work she did to provide for herself and help her family.”
With that in mind, Nelms decided to write the blog to show appreciation for all of the work his wife does — and the value that should be placed on it.
“My wife stays home and takes care of our son every single day," he said. "She changes his diapers, feeds him, plays with him, puts him down for his nap, and comforts him when he’s upset. And that’s just the bare minimum. Obviously, this is part of being a parent. You take care of your child and you raise your child. But let’s face it. In our day and age … there is a company ready and willing to do just about anything. So while, yes, my wife is my son’s mother and it is a natural result of being a parent to love and care for your own child, there is also a very quantifiable dollar amount that can be attributed to the services rendered.”
Nelms’ blog then detailed, through personal research, the various costs of the services that his wife provides as a caretaker to their child. A weekly cleaning service at $50-$100 amounts to $5,200 per year. Personal shopping, which includes buying groceries and “a new pack of white undershirts,” costs $65 per hour at four hours a week — adding up to $13,520 per year.
Glory’s services as a chef cost about $240 per week, amounting to $12,480 per year. At this point, as Nelms pointed out, his wife’s services cost $67,860 a year. “Remember, we’re working with extremely conservative averages here,” he added. Factor in “5 hours a week on financial services, 4 hours per business dinner (about 3 a year), and a weekly laundry service” and the total salary for the work that Glory does comes to $73,960."
“Looking objectively at an almost insultingly conservative average of the services rendered, I cannot afford my wife,” he concluded in the blog.
"In a very weird way, this is my way of saying how much I value my wife as the mother of my child and the one who always has my back no matter what," he said. "You are more precious than rubies. And I can’t afford you."