Happy Monday Morning YOGANONYMOUS! Hope you all had a fabulous weekend and are ready to jump-start the week with some MMM love – enjoy!
I’ve found myself falling into this little habit of skipping to the end of a book and reading the last page when I’m about halfway through. I never did that as a little girl; I loved the mysteries that books held, reading for hours, twirling my hair while draped over the arm of our wing-backed chair, JUST to find out if the boy got the girl or the skeleton mummy was finally banished. Really, I never peeked ahead, read out of order, or even quit a book without getting to the end. In fact, it never even occurred to me to do it. Maybe I just liked to follow the rules. That’s probably the reason I hated Choose Your Own Adventure.
But the past few weeks, I’ve been noticing that I’ll stick my index finger into the page where I am and flip to the last page and read a few paragraphs. It’s terrible. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I guess I’ve just become horribly impatient.
Maybe it’s because I’ve been feeling particularly rushed in life. When you’re little, you never really think about growing older except you just can’t WAIT to be 14 so your mom will FINALLY let you wear makeup and 16 so that your dad will FINALLY let you go out with a boy (or 18, if you had my dad).
I don’t really want to get older, see. I just really want all the hard stuff to be over so that I can get to living all the fun and exciting parts. In this scenario, hard stuff is:
-figuring out my ideal job
-paying less than my left arm and first born child in rent
-finding a mate who I don’t have to play that weird “what’s he thinking? does he like me? am I acting crazy? I’m probably acting crazy” game with
And the fun and exciting parts are:
-traveling all over the world with above mentioned mate
-crossing things off my bucket list
-generally being giddy at everything in life, even those annoying mariachi bands on the subway
The bummer is that I really do just want a peek; I just want a few paragraphs at the end of this chapter of my life to let me know things turn out reasonably well. Maybe I don’t get the boy, but I might be working in Honduras with some very fantastic people. Or I get super involved in a fun side project that evolves into all sorts of wild opportunities. Or I get the boy, and the job, and the bangin’ apartment. Or I don’t get any of it. I just want a little something so I can prepare for the good, the bad; anything really.
But I know that’s not how it works, and quite frankly, it shouldn’t be. Life shouldn’t give us the opportunity to find out what’s at the end, because it’s about the process. The story. The letters and words that make up the sentences, not the last few paragraphs of the chapter. It’s about HOW he got the girl, not that he actually gets her that is really important.
Realize it really is about the process. It’s about how, not when. Or where. Or how long it takes to get there.
So stop trying to skip ahead. Stop trying to get reassurance that it’ll all turn out the way you’re planning it to. I know that feeling; I’m guilty of making plans based around hypothetical scenarios. I never really understood the statement “trust the process” until I truly started trusting the process. And sometimes I forget that it’s about the process, too. It’s not easy. But then again, it’s not supposed to be.
It will all turn out exactly the way it is supposed to, I promise. And it won’t be without mistakes and struggles and failures. So just trust in the process and take a deep breath. It’s a lot easier than being so damn impatient all the time.
What is your advice for “trusting the process”?