Either Charlie Sheen really is crazy -- or he is high. Or both.
I seem to think the latter. Crazy and high = Charlie Sheen. So what if he passed a drug test! There are plenty of nifty concoctions you can guzzle down before taking a drug test that will have you passing with flying colors. I’m just not convinced.
Look at Charlie Sheen. His gray, clammy looking skin, and tired, yet wired, looking eyes. And listen to his psychobabble! Does anyone think Charlie Sheen is actually sober?
Some of Charlie Sheen’s more colorful quotes from the many interviews he has given in the past few days:
“I am on a drug, it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.”
No really, he’s sober. Ha! I bet we could play connect the dots with the holes in his brain.
“AA was written for normal people. People that don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA. [I survived drug addiction] because I’m me. I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man.”
Basically, you and I are beneath Charlie Sheen. Charlie Sheen is not only a drug, it/he is apparently super-human as well.
“It’s perfect. It’s awesome. Every day is just filled with just wins. All we do is put wins in the record books. We win so radically in our underwear before our first cup of coffee, it’s scary. People say it’s lonely at the top, but I sure like the view.”
So says the loser. Does he not realize his view is actually from the gutter?
“I’m tired of pretending like I’m not special. I’m tired of pretending like I’m not bitchin’, a total freakin’ rock star from Mars.”
What is Charlie Sheen NOT? Oh yeah, modest, sober and sane.
Charlie Sheen has these two “goddesses” now. Where did they come from? One is an adult film star and the other is just some busted model. They both look super young and during the Today Show interview, the busted model sure looked high to me. Her jaw was kicked off to the side like a kickstand and she seemed to be flying. Did you notice?
Poor Denise Richards, having to have this trainwreck of a crazy as the father of your children. Brooke Mueller too, but I think she is on the crazy train as well. Charlie Sheen says his “goddesses” and he are living like a family and that the women are helping to raise his children. Sad.
Charlie Sheen seems to be toying with the media with this bizarre game. He says he is doing it to clear his name and tell his side of the story, but by doing so we’re learning that we really didn’t know the half of his insanity. To step up his game, Charlie Sheen has also joined Twitter. No tweets of wisdom yet, but it is a verified account and we expect the crazy to come pouring out soon.
If you missed Charlie Sheen on The Today Show Tuesday, you can catch the complete interview here.