The best and worst thing about Twitter is that the time difference between having a thought and sharing it with millions of other people is now about as small as it can possibly be. That's good because it means media and legal teams don't have time to jump into action when celebrities inevitably start spouting their own special brand of narcissistic and possibly xenophobic rubbish on it, but it's bad because people by and large don't actually have any thoughts that are worth sharing. 'Having a glass of wine then going to bed, lol'. Lol indeed.
Still, circumcision seems like a reasonable topic. Surely celebrity brawler Russell Crowe can't have anything too contentious to say about that? Nothing that might offend Jews for example. Nope, not Russell. That would be totally out of character. (Via Twitter)
'My personal beliefs aside I realize that some will interpret this debate as me mocking the rituals and traditions of others. I am very sorry
I have a deep and abiding love for all people of all nationalities, I'm very sorry that I have said things on here that have caused distress
This is a great forum for communication,I,like any human have my opinions and you all have yours, thank you for trusting me with them'
Oh right. You want to know what he said before he apologised profusely. Well, when someone asked him of their newborn child 'Do you think I should get him circumstanced?', he replied: 'Here's a life rule, if you can't spell it, don't do it.' then, after a few hilarious tweets from his followers, he posted this little gem up:
'Circumcision is barbaric and stupid. Who are you to correct nature? Is it real that GOD requires a donation of foreskin? Babies are perfect.'
This then led to a series of arguments between him and the faceless internet trolls, each discussion only slightly less interesting than the last, until some bright spark piped up with the possibility that since Jews love to snip the tip then Russell might actually just be a massive Jew-hating racist. As you can imagine, that went down well with the real Aussie man, and Russell prepared to fire another salvo of abuse at his detractors, until he realised he was on very thin ice and should think about quietening down a bit. Although not thin enough to actually stop him altogether:
'Many Jewish friends, I love my Jewish friends, I love the apples and the honey and the funny little hats but stop cutting your babies @eliroth.'
Those hats are certainly funny. Unfortunately for Russell though, when you get him riled, he'll swing at anything in his way:
'I'm still waiting for @russellcrowe to give his opinion on abortion since he loves babies and all...'
To which Russell then replied:
'Abortion should always be a woman's choice, there is no benefit to "forced" motherhood...you got it? don't like it then bye.'
A good days work, we think. Abortion, Jews and circumcision. All Twitter classics.