Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen opens in theaters today. The highly anticipated sequel to the 2007 blockbuster starring Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox runs a whopping two and a half hours, and features the usual transforming creatures mixed in with car chases and wild special effects. Here's what critics are saying:
"The plot is incomprehensible... a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments. One of these involves a dog-like robot humping the leg of the heroine. Such are the meager joys."
-- Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times
"Each time the film reaches another clash of the titans, it becomes more than just a souped-up toy commercial. These toys have wizardry and grandeur. And in the case of Optimus Prime... they also have a glimmer of soul... (Director Michael) Bay knows just what his job is relative to the first Transformers (2007): It's to make the movie huger, louder, smashier, and — on the mechanical level — more crazily, audaciously imaginative. He succeeds."
-- Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly
"Squarely aimed at 8-year-old boys and men who never quite matured past that stage, 'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' is packed with so much eye candy you're risking a sugar rush. Not to mention ADD -- this bloated movie is probably the first to require a dose of Ritalin to get through all 2 ½ hours."
-- Lou Lumenick, New York Post
"The action-chase-battle sequences of Transformers are cutting-edge and undeniably powerful; only Star Trek has delivered anything this summer that can match what's here. From the opening chase-and-battle set in Shanghai to a tour-de-force finale that seems to blow up every ancient edifice in Egypt (there's a hilarious shot of one of the robots standing next to the battle-scarred face of the Sphinx), Bay proves he can deliver on the whoosh-and-wow factor."
-- Tom Maurstad, Dallas Morning News
"This is blockbuster porn absent even the suggestion of care or concern for anything that might resemble 'a point,' save the obvious one to move more Hasbro action figures and animated-series DVD boxed sets. In a word: distasteful."
-- Robert Wilonsky, The Village Voice
"The battles between giant robots are astoundingly detailed, and cleverly set in organic places like forests and deserts that add to the realism. Like its predecessor, this 'Transformers' is a terrific guilty pleasure... A worthy, if overlong, follow-up."
-- Rafer Guzman, Newsday