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'We Are Mommy And Daddy': Transgender Parents Share Their Story

A transgender couple is sharing their story of raising two boys in Louisville, Kentucky.

Bianca and Nick Bowser told ABC News “20/20” that they fit the “basic definition of what a transgender person is.”

“But we are man and woman,” Bianca said.

“That is the difference, so our children do not see us as transgender people,” Nick added. “We are mommy and daddy.”

Bianca, 32, recalled growing up as a boy named Jason.

“I guess I was about 5 years old. I remember sneaking into mom’s closet when she was off at work and putting on a pair of heels,” Bianca said. “I’ve always felt more liberated during those moments."

Nick, 27, had a similar story, growing up as a girl named Nicole.

“I looked at boys. I saw, you know, boys with their shirts off, and I was like, ‘That’s what I want to look like.’”

The teenage years were not easy for either of the two. They felt trapped in their bodies and were often teased. Even when they came out as gay, they still felt something wasn't right.

“It wasn’t until I got a little bit older that (I realized) I wasn’t a lesbian, and not all lesbians think how I think,” Nick said. “Basically, my brain is telling me I want to be a man.”

Bianca said she came to terms with being transgender when she turned 20 and started wearing makeup and women’s clothing.

Bianca and Nick each started taking hormones and considering surgeries.

Even after coming to terms with their sexual identities, Bianca and Nick feared they would never find life partners.

“I had planned on the gender reassignment surgery, and I was starting to save up my money for it,” Bianca said. “I had already made my plans, went through all my final therapy sessions, and then I met Nick.”

The two met at a local bar, and Nick says he quickly fell in love with Bianca. They got married in 2010 at a small ceremony in Georgia.

Both still had their original sex organs, and they eventually decided to start a family and conceive naturally. Nick said it was a difficult time for him.

“The almost 20 months total of my life (when they had both kids) was probably the darkest time in my entire life,” Nick said. “My brain was telling me that I was one person; my body looks like a completely different person. It was a daily struggle between mind and body. I didn't want to leave the house.”

Nick gave birth to both boys. Kai is 3 years old and Pax is 17 months old.

Today, both parents work at a Louisville nightclub called Play. Nick is the manager, and Bianca is a performer.

Bianca and Nick said they understand the difficulties that lie ahead but they are prepared to answer any questions Kai and Pax may have.

“I mean, that’s when we tell them sometimes men have babies, and sometimes mommies can’t have babies,” Nick explained. “We’re telling them the truth, and I think that that’s the most important thing, and in a way that they can understand.”

Nick was able to fulfill his dream of having his breasts removed, while Bianca’s gender reassignment surgery has been put on hold.

“Now that we have our children, their well-being, their lives, that’s what’s important,” Bianca said. “If it comes around to where I am able to, then that would be great, but it’s no longer about me.

“It’s about our family.”

Nick admitted they were different but added: “We’re the same type of family everybody else is.”

Source: ABC News / Photo Credit: ABC News


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