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Homer Simpsons of World Rejoice; House Passes Beer Week Resolution

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By "Radical" Russ Belville

Who wouldn't want to celebrate a toxic substance?

(Politico) While most of Washington was focused on Tuesday’s election results, the House was busy doing something else: Passing a resolution about beer.

House Resolution 1297, sponsored by Rep. Betsy Markey, supports “the goals and ideals of American Craft Beer Week.”

“We’ve got quite a number of microbreweries and entrepreneurs that are creating jobs, and we wanted to celebrate that this is a craft,” Markey told POLITICO.

“I think beer has been a tradition since this country was founded,” said Markey. “We wanted to celebrate entrepreneurship — and good beer!”

Markey is obviously partial to brews from her home state of Colorado, but she won’t claim a favorite.

“You can’t just have one,” said Markey. “It really depends on what mood you’re in. Sometimes, I like a light beer — I might want a Skinny Dip — or otherwise prefer a heavier brew.”

The real question is: Why would anyone vote against this?

“It does seem like a no brainer,” said Markey.

Well, who wouldn’t want to celebrate the substance that leads to drunk driving deaths, cirrhosis deaths, cancer deaths, domestic violence, assaults, and the occasional puddle of puke?

I’m not saying we should make beer illegal or deny drinkers a chance to celebrate.  I’m just saying you’ll have a much better and safer time at the no-alcohol Seattle Hempfest.


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