College Newspaper Editor Resigns: "Disney Gang Rape" April Fool's Issue

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The editor of a college newspaper has resigned after putting out an April Fool's issue that joked about Disney characters being gang raped.

For April Fool's Day, Boston University's The Daily Free Press was renamed The Disney Free Press, and the lead story was about "seven frat dwarves" arrested for gang raping a female student, "described as 'the fairest of them all.'"

The Daily Mail reports there was outrage on campus, especially because there have been several incidents lately of sexual assaults at the school.

The article had a fake byline: Princess Diana, Supreme Ruler of Disney World. It is widely believed that the writer was Chelsea Diana, a sophomore who was the paper's editor-in-chief.

The paper's editorial board asked Diana to resign, which she did. She also issued a statement in which she apologized for her actions:

Simply put, we should have exercised caution. Our decisions were juvenile and insensitive. We deeply regret our heartless behavior and did not mean to personally offend anyone...

Our intention was to produce material that would be seen as ridiculous and fictitious. However, we understand that these serious issues should not have been characterized as joking matters.

Here is the article in its entirety:

Seven frat dwarves were arrested last night after they allegedly drugged and gangbanged a Boston University student in an Allson Village cabin.

The female victim, described as the 'fairest of them all,' reported to have been roofied after drinking an appletini at the Beta Rho omega fraternity party , according to Captain Robert Hook of the BU Police Department.

The girl with raven black hair and bright red lips, Hook said, woke up wearing no clothes with seven BRO dwarves laying naked in bed with her. She called BUPD immediately and was sent to the Far Far Away hospital in Never Ever land.

'When we arrived at the scene she was surrounded by talking rabbits and birds,' Hok said in an interview with the Disney Free Press. 'I thought I had lost my f**king mind.'

The seven BRO brothers were sent to the Allston Village jailhouse where they were released after each paying a $5,000 bail.

Allston Village District Attorney Peter Pan said the BRO members will appear in court next month. The BRO's face seven charges of sexual conduct and seven charges of drugging someone into unconsciousness. 'Heigh-ho BROs we didn't do anything,' said Sleepy, a senior in the College of Engineering and president of BRO, who is a suspect in the alleged sexual assault. 'But heigh-ho heigh-ho it's off to jail we go.'

BRO has been under serious review from the Interfraternity Council for the last month after allegations of illegal wild naked parties came to light earlier this year.

'BRO has bro0ed itself out,' said Gaston, the Chairman of the IFC. 'No one drinks like the BROs, no one shoots like the BROs and definitely no one should rape like the BROs'

The fraternity is known for its rousing parties where the 'cocktails flow freely and b****es are easy,' according to a BU student who wishes to remain anonymous.'

The IFC as of this morning suspended BRO from all campus activities until further notice.

'The is unacceptable behavior. Female students should be able to assert their femininity without being assaulted,' said Pocahontas, the president of Boston University's Center for Gender, Sexuality and Magical Creatures.

The CGSC is calling for a university-wide analysis of underage drinking on campus and the sterilization of all BU males.

'I want our women to be safe and I want our appletinis to be drug-free,' Pocahontas said. 'But most of all I want to be able to party without worrying about being gang-banged by a bunch of BROs.'


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