A 33-year-old British woman from Chelmsford, Essex is claiming that her good looks made it hard for her to find herself a man.
Paula Jayne Allen describes herself as “a size six, with long blonde hair and blue eyes” and as having “done a bit of modelling in the past.”
Allen says she joined an online dating site five years ago—but her experience wasn’t exactly positive.
“I went on two dating websites—Match.com and eHarmony—about five years ago, just before I met my now-husband and it was awful,” Allen recalls.
She says she struggled with finding “a man who would see me as more than just ‘piece of meat,’ it was so hard. I just felt like eye candy.” Many of the men, claims Allen, wanted “one night stands” or a woman who would “sit there, be quiet and just be arm candy.”
Allen says she thought that because sites “guarantee to match you up with someone who shares your interests,” online dating would be “more about personality.”
Instead, she would “regularly get people getting in contact just saying, “Fancy meeting up for a f**k?”
Many men simply wanted to use her to impress their friends with a good-looking girl. On other occasions, if she would try having intelligent conversations with her dates, Allen say the men simply “wouldn’t want to see you again.”
And it wasn’t only single men who would reach out to Allen: she says that married men would frequently ask her to be their mistress.
“They have no shame,” she notes.
“It really was truly awful,” Allen recalls, adding that the situation became “frustrating, it got disheartening and I gave up.”
Several months after giving up on dating sites, Paula met her now-husband, Mark. The couple first met 14 years ago; they dated for a couple months before breaking up because, as Allen describes it, “he was quiet and I was too outgoing.”
Ten years later, the couple bumped back into each other, after which Allen looked him up on Facebook and asked him out for a drink. “We pretty much haven’t been apart since,” she says. The couple has now been together for four years; they have two children.
Allen says that she now hopes that her story will inspire other women to understand that finding love often was little to do with physical appearance.
“My best friend is a size 20, but she doesn’t care in the slightest—we’re like little and large—but she gets more attention than I do because she has so much confidence,” Allen says.
MailOnline reports that Allen read an interview with a size 24 woman, Verity Brown, who has struggled to find a man on dating websites because she is overweight; Allen, however, maintains that she had even harder time finding a partner because men saw her as nothing more than a trophy.
Allen claims that she is now sharing her story, not to brag about her good looks, but to inspire women like Verity not to change for a man.
“Mr. Right will be there whether or not she loses the weight—she shouldn’t have to change that, she should be happy as she is,” Allen says.
Allen notes that “I didn’t change a thing about me,” and that “I still found my husband at the end of it all.”
Photo Sources: MailOnline