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Woman Gets 'Grief Tattoo' After Miscarriage

| by Zara Zhi
Bremer's tattooBremer's tattoo

The story behind a California woman's seemingly mundane tattoo has gone viral.

Joan Bremer, 31, says she started to experience cramping and bleeding seven weeks into her first pregnancy. The doctor confirmed she was having a miscarriage.

"It took about three days to recover, and during that time I thought of getting a tattoo to mark this life experience," Bremer told Today. "For me, all the tattoos I have signify something, and even though this was a painful time, I still wanted to be able to remember it in some way."

In memory of her unborn child, she researched tattoos that would convey her grief. Bremer decided on an image of a single line connecting two hearts and completed the tattoo shortly after the miscarriage.

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"If we are able to carry a baby to term and have a healthy child, I will add a rainbow baby to this design since 'rainbow babies' are babies that are conceived after a loss, just like how something beautiful can come after a storm," Bremer told Today "If I end up having a second miscarriage, I will most likely add another heart to this design."

Bremer shared a picture of her new tattoo on Imgur with a caption that read, “I had a miscarriage two weeks ago ... And I got this to remember the baby that wasn't meant to be.”

The June 19 post got more than 54,000 views and 335 comments within three days, with many users sharing their own stories of miscarriage.

"Losing a baby, even if it's early in pregnancy, is just so difficult," said Bremer. "For me, it was healing to be able to speak about it. I know there is a certain silence about miscarriages and pregnancy losses, but I am not ashamed that this happened to me. That was one of my motivations for getting the tattoo in the first place -- I really think it's healing to be able to talk about it."

Bremer says her motive for sharing the tattoo was to break the taboo of discussing miscarriages as if it were something to be ashamed of.

"This is so incredibly common, but it's not a subject that people want to talk about," Bremer continued. "It happened to us, and it's happened to countless other people. I want to be able to share and talk about it, and in talking about it move on from the pain and disappointment."

Sources: Today, Imgur / Photo credit: Joan Bremer via Today

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