Religion

Kirk Cameron And Sister Offer Christian Marriage Tips

| by Michael Allen

Christian actor Kirk Cameron and his sister Candace Cameron Bure are encouraging women to follow and submit to their husbands for a happier marriage.

Cameron, 45, has visited almost 200 churches, during which he has given marriage tips to Christian couples; he does not have a psychology or counseling degree listed on his website.

Cameron told The Christian Post on April 9 about God's guidelines for marriage:

A lot of people don't know that marriage comes with instructions. And we find them right there in God's word. [Husband's are] to love their wives and not to tell their wives that they need to submit to them.

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Wives are to honor and respect and follow their husband's lead, not to tell their husband how he ought to be a better husband. When each person gets their part right, regardless of how their spouse is treating them, there is hope for real change in their marriage.

Cameron, who is a part of the "Love Worth Fighting For" national marriage tour with singer/songwriter Warren Barfield, was apparently referencing Colossians 3:18-19, which, according to Bible Gateway, states: "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them."

That book in the Bible was written by the Apostle Paul, who noted he was single in 1 Corinthians 7:8: "But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am."

Cameron also warned married couples about arguments, The Christian Post notes:

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Thinking that you are going to win an argument, you end up losing. It's a no-win situation. In order for you to win, your husband or wife has to lose. When they lose, you have not built up your marriage. You have really cut them down.

When couples start arguing and fighting in front of the kids, dad cuts mom and mom cuts dad and the kids bleed. They see that and it damages them. When the kids get to marriage, they will follow patterns that they see.

What most people do is they try to blame their spouse and say, "Hey, I would be a great husband if it weren't for my wife. We would have a great marriage if it wasn't for my husband." This talks to the importance of getting your own part right. There is only one person on the whole planet who you can change and it's not your spouse.

In her 2014 book "Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose," Cameron Bure wrote about marriage: "The definition I'm using with the word 'submissive' is the biblical definition of that. So, it is meekness, it is not weakness. It is strength under control, it is bridled strength. And that's what I choose to have in my marriage."

Bure expounded on marriage during a January 2015 interview with Yahoo! News:

[Last year] I used the word “submissive” [to describe my role in the marriage] because it’s from the Bible but people who don’t understand that see that as offensive. My husband is not a dictator. We work together but I don’t want to dig my heels in and I have no aspirations to be the ruler of my family. We are two equal people but I love my husband and I want him to lead.

With big picture issues such as where we live or what schools the kids attend, if he feels strongly about something and I think our family would benefit from it, I am going to share my thoughts. But ultimately, I trust that my husband has our family’s best interests at heart, so I wouldn’t fight him on that. And when I feel strongly about something, he agrees with me. It goes both ways.

Sources: The Christian Post, Yahoo! News, Bible Gateway (2), Kirk Cameron / Photo Credit: Luigi Novi/Wikimedia Commons

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