Rand Paul Airs His Grievances For Festivus

| by Amanda Andrade-Rhoades
Sen. Rand Paul.Sen. Rand Paul.

If you’re gathering ‘round the aluminum pole to air your grievances, Republican presidential candidate Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky will be joining you. Paul celebrated the tradition of Festivus, which originates from a 1997 episode of sitcom “Seinfeld,” by tweeting his gripes about his fellow candidates, The Huffington Post reported.

Paul kicked off the festivities by attacking front-runner Donald Trump. “If [you] bring the Yiddish, know what it means. Guess that's more of a kvetch than a grievance,” Paul tweeted, referencing Trump’s recent use of the word “schlonged” in reference to Democratic rival former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. For those who are a little rusty on their Yiddish-American slang, kvetch refers to a complaint.

“After the debates, [Trump] always trying to give us parting gifts of his made in China ties. Weird,” Paul added.

Paul had a slightly lighter grievance against Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas, who was born in Canada but is allowed to run for office because he’s considered a “natural-born citizen.”

“My friend [Sen. Ted Cruz] has still not pledged to issue exec order declaring Canadian "bacon" is not real bacon. Makes me suspicious,” Paul tweeted with the hashtag "Festivus."

Paul was similarly lighthearted when he tackled New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, who is a fan of the Dallas Cowboys. “I think I speak for all in [New Jersey] when I say [Gov. Christie] I don't care how much [money you] spend at Met Life, Cowboys fans should stay out.”

Although Paul didn’t go after Sen. Lindsey Graham, who dropped out of the presidential race earlier this week, he didn’t hesitate to attack other contenders. “I have no grievances against my fellow doc [Dr. Ben Carson] because I have not heard a word he has said in any debate,” Paul tweeted, referring to Carson’s notably quiet voice.

Paul also went after Sen. Marco Rubio of Florida, who has been criticized for missing several votes on Capitol Hill. “To my absentee friend [Rubio] I didn't put your $170k+ salary in my waste report today. But I could have.”

Paul didn’t limit his grievances to the Republican candidate field. “To my comrade [Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont]: Unless you're Santa Claus, Socialism runs out of other people's money,” he tweeted. 

He also took a jab at front-runner Hillary Clinton’s tardiness to the podium after a restroom break during the last debate. “[Carly Fiorina] has ZERO trouble making it back from commercial breaks, [Clinton]. Just saying,” he tweeted, with the hashtag “war on women’s restrooms.”

Sources: The Huffington Post, Rand Paul/Twitter / Photo credit: Gage Skidmore/Flickr