Movies

Jessica Biel: "Justin Timberlake Had More Beauty Products Than Me"

| by

Jessica Biel pretty much just called Justin Timberlake a pussy. There's really no other way to put it. From the National Enquirer:

Just a few months after her headline-making split from Justin Timberlake, Jessica Biel has found herself a "real man" -- her hot Scot movie co-star Gerard Butler! The gorgeous actress is telling pals that Gerard is the complete opposite of pretty boy Justin - and that she likes his rugged ways. "Jessica used to laugh and say Justin kept more beauty products in the bathroom than she did," a friend told The Enquirer. "It would take him an hour or more to get ready to face the world in the morning."

"Gerard just seems to roll out of bed and seize the day. At first blush, Gerard doesn't seem to be Jessica's type - she's always gone for the metrosexual kind of guy," the friend continued. "Gerard is a bit coarse and rumpled around the edges, and that's like a breath of fresh air to Jessica after Justin."

Let this be a lesson to all the metrosexuals out there. Hot women like Jessica Biel don't like their men to be experts in hair products, skin moisturizers, and Fall colors. They like them to be able to lift heavy objects, kill scary spiders, and not care about their cuticles. It's why guys like Jason Statham, Vin Diesel, and myself always end up banging hotties and guys from Jersey Shore always end up sleeping with skanks that look like Snooki.