Womens Health

Snooki Getting Breast Implants

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I don't know why this even counts as news, but Snooki told E! that she's getting her boobs done. Well, duh. If she ever wants to go into politics, she needs to get those things firmed up a little.

[Snooki] tweeted not to long ago that she wants "knockers" like her Jersey Shore bestie JWoww. Yup, she's going under the knife!

"Very soon. Very soon," Snooki told me earlier today when she and JWoww stopped by E! to promote Thursday night's fifth-season premiere of their hit MTV reality show. "I hope in the next couple of months."

Snookers doesn't actually want bigger boobs. "They're a good size now, but I want them like this when I'm not wearing a bra," she said, cupping and lifting her chest up.

Well, if Snooki insists on going under the knife, I feel it's my responsibility to guide her to the right surgeon, you know, to keep her safe and all. I hear Darfur's nice this time of year. And Afghanistan. Excellent surgeons there at rock bottom prices. You really can't go wrong with either place.