In news that will surely shock and dismay the hundreds of thousands of women looking to insert Johnny Depp into their family's genetic database (IF YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN) it seems the actor has chosen himself a new girlfriend. Worst of all, this new lover is almost certainly not you, because it's Amber Heard. Soz.
In fact the only glimmer of hope in this whole sorry (if you're not Amber Heard) story is that it comes via a source. A SOURCE. A source who was quoted as saying the following (via Us Magazine)
"They are 100 percent dating. He treats her really well."
"They started sleeping together during the [Rum Diary] press tour."
Popular VideoThis young teenage singer was shocked when Keith Urban invited her on stage at his concert. A few moments later, he made her wildest dreams come true.
Well, sounds like we all might as well just pack up your drawers and go back to whatever remains of our life. It's over. The dream is over.
Unless this is all total horseshit. Which it might be.
Oh, and if you were hoping Amber's ugly or deformed or something, then you'll be heartbroken to know she really isn't. Bummer, eh? Here's a quick peek (link NSFW)...