Entertainment

Madonna Has to Stand in Line at Airport, Not Happy

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We were vaguely aware that Madonna was bothering babies in hot countries again, but hadn’t realised quite how many people in Malwai would like her to piss off home. It seems Madge’s claim to have built schools over there is contested by President Banda, who is also a bit miffed that the Queen of Pop sacked her sister as head of Madonna’s charity. It’s like these people don’t even want help from a vain billionaire.

From what we can gather, Madonna arrived in Malawi with the children she stole adopted for a tour of ten primary schools she claims her charity the Raising Malawi Academy for Girls had built.
 
But the country’s education minister has a different take on her achievements, telling the BBC:
 
“They have said... they have built ten schools in Malawi and on our side what we know is that she has built classrooms...”
 
Potato, tomato…
 
On her way out of the country Madonna was subjected to the inhumane treatment of having to queue up at security like everyone else. And it seems this wasn’t a mere oversight but an actual government directive. Hilarious.
 
A source at Kamuzu International Airport told The Telegraph:
 
“There was a directive that Miss Louise Ciccone, travelling on an American passport, and her children should use the ordinary passenger terminal on their way to their jet.
 
“Her manager Trevor Neilson [not that one] and her security detail tried to negotiate but we told them we can't open the VIP lounge without authorization. Madonna and Mr Neilson were very annoyed by this.”
 
More hilarious.
 
The reason behind the snubbing seems to be that Madonna sacked the CEO of her charity, who also happens to be the sister of Malawi’s first female president Joyce Banda. The president also refused to meet with the singer, even after she wrote her an informal letter in which she misspelled “responsability” and demonstrated the handwriting skills of a drunk spider. You can see the letter here.  
 
Still, apart from that the trip went really well.