Turkey: Angelina Jolie, Johnny Depp's "The Tourist"

| by Hollywood Elsewhere

"Directed by Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck, taking a radical step backward from his Oscar-winning debut The Lives of Others, The Tourist illustrates what happens when you cast two giant, self-orbiting stars and then are either too intimidated or too confused to actually direct them," writes the Star-Telegram's Christopher Kelly. "It also illustrates what happens when you compound a bad idea with poorly telegraphed twists and no dramatic tension whatsoever.

"Von Donnersmarck has conjured up a movie in love with its own Hollywood artificiality; at one point, and for no discernible reason, Jolie is dressed up to look like Sophia Loren and attends a formal ball.

But there's nothing to care about here, and the action is all ineptly staged. Paul Bettany and Timothy Dalton end up leading Keystone Kops routines that are funny for all the wrong reasons.

The movie sputters to a conclusion so predictable you first feel embarrassed for all involved, until your embarrassment turns to indignation: How stupid does Hollywood believe audiences to be if they think they can put a turkey like The Tourist over on us?"