A Response to Venker Piece on Oprah's Gay-Marriage Bias
[Ed.'s Note: The following post is a follow-up to Venker's own piece "Politically Correct Oprah has 'Bias' Towards Gay Marriage" that ran on Opposing Views Nov. 13.]
I received the email below yesterday from a reader. He corrected my facts on the numbers, and humbled me just a bit. Thanks, Timothy.
One thing, though: My comment about Portia was rather tongue-in-cheek. I have no idea if her homosexuality is a fact or a matter of confusion, as it was for Anne Heche. These days, with so much experimentation and confusion among the sexes, it's hard to tell anything anymore.
Suzanne,
I have two clarifications of fact for you. First, you said.
Did you know that just 2.9% of Americans older than 18 identify as either lesbian, gay, or bisexual?
That is factually incorrect. The CDC report released in 2005 (based on 2002 survey) is our most comprehensive and best source. It found that 4.1% of both men and women identify as either lesbian, gay or bisexual.
It also found that only 90% identify as heterosexual with some uncertainty as to how the remained identify (about 4% said "something else" and about 2% refused to answer).
Second, you said
..one of whom is clearly a lesbian and one of whom is clearly not.
It may seem to you that Portia (or perhaps Ellen) isn't really a lesbian. However, both have a long history of same-sex attraction, and it is that which defines who is and who is not lesbian. Having known a number of very pretty feminine lesbians (including a former model) who were quite content in their attractions,
I don't think that being feminine or having long flowing blond hair tells us anything whatsoever about who is or is not a lesbian. So perhaps language other than "clearly is not" might have been a more accurate choice.
And finally, I think you are selling yourself short. You assume that you would not be touched by a same-sex wedding, that you would not tear up.
I believe otherwise. I think that if you were at the wedding of someone you know and love, someone you've seen establish, work through, doubt, wonder, come to trust, finally come to fully love, and then to make a commitment to their relationship, you would not care in the slightest whether it was a guy or a gal that they were marrying. We don't go to weddings and tear up thinking "ah, heterosexuality"; no we think "ah, love".
I bet you'd tear up too.
Thanks,
Timothy Kincaid
www.boxturtlebulletin.com
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I don't know the statistics about Gays or for that matter about the statistics regarding any animal life. However, I do know that the media has done its best or worst to make some of the most persoanl ideals in this country a matter of their business, to the detrement of all the rest of us.
I do not care about what goes on in the bedrooms of anyone else but myself and I don't think that anyone else has the right to make judgements that don't concern them.
The media has managed to take religion out of the lives of many people, and we see where that has gotten us, crime is up, our children are running wild because their parents are either afraid of them or are too busy to be parents, so the media has taken over that job as well.
When are the American people going to get back to some old fashioned ideals?
Would it be too difficult for everyone to mind his/her own business and improve the lives of their own family and help some of their neighbors who are having problems in these times just getting it together.
I agree with Mr. Venker for the most part and I don't think anything is accomplished by parading peoples differences out on TV is anything more than a way to get ratings, the one reason, I do not watch the talk shows. I'd rather read a good book .Not necessarily one on Oprah's list.
I did not see the beginning of this conversation, so I will not comment on that. However, the last paragraph of your reponse was so true and clear. I wonder if we will ever get past the need to label as a part of who we are.