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Daycare Benefits Children
- From Nataly Kogan
By Nataly Kogan - Co-founder, workitmom.com
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There is no proof of this
Actually, studies have shown that the opposite is true. Kids get illnesses more often. Also, many children suffer attachment disorders when put into day care at a young age. Day care kids are known to have more behavior problems when compared to children that stay home with a loving parent.
- Iknowbetter
September 29, 2008 2:34AM
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Yes, there is proof
Actually, many pediatricians and studies show children who attend daycare at a young age have less health problems when older; meaning less school days missed, and less work days missed as adults. It seems that the belief here is a mother staying home full-time is the only good option for children. Most of my conversations with SAHM's is listening to them complain and talk about how difficult it is to be home with their kids; that they never get a break from them, etc.
Not all children who stay home with a parent are with a loving healthy parent. Many mothers who stay home full-time are not happy and the kids home with them pick up on that and will probably need therapy because of it.
- WorkingMomof1
September 30, 2008 3:11PM
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That is because they are sick more at younger ages
When kids get sick at younger ages they build that immunity so that would make sense. But I'd hate to see babies and toddlers sick over older children who can handle illness easier and better. They are just exposed to more illnesses at an earlier age in day care and build their immunity. Those are very misleading studies and neglect the part where babies and toddlers get sick more often in day care, when their immune systems are not fully developed. They are not fully developed until they are 5.
And yes your right there are lots of unhappy parents, whether they work or not. Could you imagine though if this stressed out, angry parent (that you speak of), also worked on top of child care duties? The situation would most likely be much worse, as far as care for the child goes.
- Iknowbetter
September 30, 2008 9:47PM
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I am laughing at this
Where are you getting your research from...and with home with a loving parent, this is so self righteous, implying our kids are devoid of loving parent at home. I wont repeat what i said but read my comments in the same debate
http://www.opposingviews.com/arguments/childrens-physical-health-suffers-when-mothers-are-absent/comments
http://www.opposingviews.com/arguments/children-of-working-mothers-often-struggle-with-boundaries
http://www.opposingviews.com/arguments/full-time-day-care-causes-health-and-behavior-problems-in-children/comments
- Najma jay
January 23, 2009 8:05PM
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Really? After reading through all of this, you doubt it?
As I've said before "denial" is not just a river in Egypt.
It's really a no brainer that a child is better off home with a loving parent than at a daycare with a minimum wage earner who does not have the "vested" interest in the child, like a loving parent would. The person may "like" kids and jr. may like them back, but that does not mean that they are better off with them. Why have kids in the first place, if you are planning to have other people raise them? It's not fair for the child or the minimum wage worker, who might aspire to do something else more constructive than raise other people's wanted only part-time children. ( And I'm talking about people who made the "choice" to work because they feel that is more important than being a parent at home.) Being a parent is not and should not be a part-time job, people. I mean really? The poor children that grow-up thinking that they were not worth staying home with because their parents thought other things were more important then they were. Sad!
- Iknowbetter
January 23, 2009 8:48PM
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Denial or arrogance???
So you will home school i guess, since group environment will have some effect on kids whether it is in daycare or school. They will learn bad things, they will get sick, they will develop emotional issues in every group setting IF THE Parent doesnt take responsibility and just thinks since I stayed home i did my part of being loving and sacrificer. Bottom line is all these issues are found in kids at home as well. I have been A SAHM for 2 years but now I am working first it was by choice now it is because I have to. I started with choice b/c my child was old enough to go to a preschool and be with other kids so I started to work but in this economy it is needed for our family and my accidental pregnancy we have to have our son on daycare....Nonetheless, he hasnt been sick yet other than cold that My daughter also got when she was home with me all the time, He is on a very good sleep schedule b/c it is my absolute responsibility to make sure they both get their 12 hrs of night we can always play on weekends, they both love to read with me when we come home and on weekends and Ihave SAHM who have horrible lack of discipline and routine and out of control kids. If being loving means stay home and hating it than no thank you. BTW I LOVED LOVED SAHM, and It bugs the hell out of me when SAH moms complain all the time that dont get a break. Why complain if it is such a big deal, I never ever felt like I was trapped with my DD and I absolutley adored every moment of it no matter who sick I got with my PPD. But if a mom is going to complain all the time and act like she is doing some huge favor to kids by being SAH, its better she looks deep into why she is so dissatisfied rather being miserable. Ihave been on both sides of raising a baby at home and while working by far working and doing it is much harder than being home since I have to make sure I keep them on their routine and do everything i did when I was home. I am sure many working moms do that time management juggling work and home. And its not always about money, if a mom wants to have a sense of self other than being a mom and she wants to pursue her life as a human being that is her right. Had I been using my Physician education you bet I would have worked through out after coming out of med school but I didnt continue it for verious personal reasons. I want to give my children the idea that you can do anything you want and life is not a bed of roses, sometimes you have to make tough decisions to keep a roof on your head and that is as loving as it can get when it comes to being a mom. Seriously this judging other parents who are not like you or SAHM needs to stop, you sure dont love my kids more than me and i dont love yours more than you, so people need to get off of their high horses and pass judgment on other parents imposing they are selfish and unloving. PERIOD. Every one knows what works for their family. And those minimum wage workers you talk so lowly about happen to be very hardworking women and men who believe it or not are taking care of my child and While Jr. seems happy to see them, I as a mother sense he is well taken care of in my absence, My child has reached all his milestones right on time and even before he is suppose to, I wonder who is working on him every day when i am at work. I respect day care workers and teachers immensly. They are unappreciated and underpaid for the work they do and then we have people like you who calle them "minimum wage workers" Off my soap box
- Najma jay
January 23, 2009 9:51PM
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Defensive much?
I "hear" your defensiveness in your rationalization that the choices that you are making for your child are all right and good. It still does not mean that your child would not be better off with you or jr.'s dad. Also, jr. is still not getting the advantages of a stay at home parent (and yes kids are hugely advantaged that have a stay at home parent). All I hear is that your needs come before your child's attachment needs and that there is some guilt for you in that. I'm so glad I'm not you or your child. It's just a bummer that so many kids are being raised by strangers and are not forming proper, healthy primary attachments that make them emotionally healthy children and adults. This is why so much of our society is such a mess to begin with.
- Iknowbetter
January 24, 2009 3:48AM
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Not a bit
I am not a bit defensive and not to you anyways, i dont think I owe anyone any explaination at all. YOu are so arrogant and hell bent on making other parents feel like their children have attachment issues and your dont, i seriously think if you are this obstinate with your kids Jr. sure will have some serious issues growing up lol. The inflexibility you are showing in even giving the other side even a chance is a character trait i am sure and i think you are the one who shoudl really be worried about junior not getting his point through to you ever.
BTW i have been on both sides of fence and I absolutely love both but WOHM is so much more harder than SAHM but of course I know it because i have done it both ways and my kids are perfect both ways, regardless of what your ideas might be. 8 out of 10 times a misbehaving and out of control child in a mall is usually a SAH child so yes they are better off b/c majority of moms who SAH resent their husbands saying you get to get out, and I dont, you get a break and i dont...do not go on denying that. I can find millions of web references to the disadvantages of SA Children b/c if you can find ref, so can anyone else. And lol you should be glad you are not me b/c A i have far more education that you reading your responses, B I have my kids on a very healthy life routine and C b/c I am not hell bent on proving that your child is at a disadvantage. B/c he is not and neither is mine.
You know why our society is a mess....not b/c of working parents who are trying to keep a roof on their childrens head b/c yes that is their need to fput food on table and keep a house to live in (lucky you you don thave to worry about it) as i can see you are mostly on line so what a quality time your kids are having lol. My kids are both still asleep and were last night too since 8 o clock when i was answering here. Anyway the reason we are a mess is because of people like you who think anyone not living their way is wrong and horrible, if only people can open their mind and think about other situations out side their little worlds things will be so much better but than again it needs to get out of the house and looka round which to you is the biggest wrong a person can do. Good luck to you and your family.
I am sure to your mind I am still defending parents like me but really think about it, i amtrying to show you people have all kinds of reasons to work and if one of them is self growth, there is nothing wrong with it. Open your head and mind to other possibilities and styles of parenting and teach your children the same diversity and acceptance of other's point of view other wise my dear you are pushing them in a world with huge surprises they might not be able to face, since thery being so formed PROPER...lol
Good luck
- Najma jay
January 24, 2009 9:45AM
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It helped my preemie
My son was born at 31 weeks. He started daycare at 8 and one half weeks old. He could have had developmental delays due to his prematurity, but he doesn't. Did he get sick more, not really. He has asthma and seasonal allergies and was only hospitalized once, for his asthma. He rarely needed asthma meds. My daughter, has never been in day care. After she was born, hubby and I decided I'd stay home with her (I do still work though, I run my husband's computer business and my candle business). She's clingy, hates being left with anyone and terribly shy; whereas my son is outgoing, tells me "bye mommy" and give me a kiss when I leave him with someone and is by no means clingy.
Even my kids doctor said that being in day care helped my son developmentally. Starting next fall, my son will go to pre-school 2 or 3 days a week and my daughter will go to day care during that time too. My son misses the socialization and my daughter needs it. I enjoy working and feel like I'm wasting the degree I worked so hard for. Plus, I'm bored staying at home, especially when business is slow.
My mother and step-mother both worked full-time. If anything, that showed me how to manage my time and that it's about the quality of the time spent with family, not the quantity.
- candlemomma124
October 1, 2008 6:58AM
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re: It helped my preemie
I'm glad to hear that your preemie son did not have health delays....I'm not buying that he did not get more sick than he would have, if he had been home with you. Many studies say that younger kids in day care are exposed to more germs (how could they not be?).
It's actually NORMAL for babies and toddlers to be clingy. That shows that they are properly attached to mom and dad. It is unusual and NOT healthy that a baby or toddler would NOT have seperation anxiety. Read the section on attachment in this link for more info.
http://www.sparknotes.com/101/psychology/development/infancy_and_childhood.html
I can provide you many more links in regards to this.
The kids' doctor does not know, if your son would have done better developmentallly had he been home with you and NOT at day care. He has no way of knowing this.
That's too bad that you feel that you are "wasting" a degree. It's strange that you would not feel like you were "wasting" your children's childhood, if you were to put that degree and work, as a priority over your children. A degree is intangible and can always be picked up or used later. Your children, unfortunately, can't be. They won't be children forever. Your children are more important than any degree. You and they will be missing out, if you choose working and a degree as more important than they are. Quantity AND quality do matter. There are many studies that show this, including this recent and interesting one which points out economic status matters as well:
http://www.newsweek.com/id/158462
So a child in an impoverished, low income situation would do better in day care educationally and physically because of so much "lacking" at home. I'd be curious to know how they fared emotionally, though. This study does not really address the attachment part.
If you're bored staying home why not get some hobbies that you can do at home or work from home, so that you can be with your children? Working full time outside of the home is just one of many options to conquer boredom.
It is indeed about Quality AND Quantity. Children know the difference. Don't think that they don't understand or won't be affected by your choices.
- Iknowbetter
October 1, 2008 10:39AM
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Right
Trust me, I'm a much better mother when I have some adult time. It really upsets me that you insinuate my son isn't "properly attached to mom and dad" because I can leave him with a sitter and go to a doctor's appointment alone. How dare you! If my son gets hurt, only mommy or daddy can kiss it and make it better, no one else is good enough.
when I worked, my son had the opportunity to go out into the world, play with kids who weren't like him, do projects I wouldn't have thought of doing (like cutting out his hand-prints to make an ice cream cone, this is my favorite project he made at day care). I never once felt I was "wasting" my kids childhood, I felt I was enriching it. I have a 2 year old who says "please", "thank you" and "no, thank you" without being prompted, something they worked on in day care that I thought he was too young to understand. I don't believe in keeping my kids in a bubble.
And unless you are living in my house, who can you say you don't buy he didn't get more sick?
- candlemomma124
October 1, 2008 10:52AM
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there is a difference
A sitter for a short time, while you go to an appointment is a lot different than a all-day, everyday day care. I did not say that getting a sitter once in awhile was eqivalent to day care. I'm sorry that you misread that.
And yes kids know when we are not there for them to kiss an owie or other traumatic experience. Day care taught your 2 year old compliance. They have no idea what please and thank you means at this age, just that it's something that adults drill into their heads and demand from them. A 2 year old is not cognicent enough to get "manners." They just know that they have to say it or jump through this hoop to get something that they want.
Also, because you were not home with your son when he was a baby, we will never know if he would not have been sick as much had he been home with you. Because of exposure to many children and their germs, it makes sense that he would have been sick more often in day care, though.
- Iknowbetter
October 1, 2008 11:21AM
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sure
First off, I leave them with a sitter for short times now, as I work from home and they are no longer in day care. Secondly, my son was only in day care for about 8 hours (if not less) at most 5 days a week.
You don't think my kid has mannors? I say "do you want a snack?" he says "yes" I hand him his snack and he says "thank you, mommy" no prompling from me. When he wants his cup refilled, he says "more stuff in it, please" once again without prompting. My children do not perform to get something. I think it's a great thing that they can learn to function in a group setting. So my 2 year old says please and thank you, I'm such a bad mother for encourging manners. I love the fact that he says them, I really don't care if he truly understands what they mean, it'll just be easier for him to use them when he's older.
And his ONE hospitalization from asthma probably would not have been prevented. He needed to have his meds changed. He went back to day care after that, on the new meds, and hasn't had a bad attack since. He was 12 months old when he was hospitalized, he left day care at 22 months, he's now 29 months. No attack needing the nebulizar in over 12 months. Sounds really good to me.
And I don't think I worded the "properly attached" sentence. My kids seem attached quite properly to my husband and myself, and one of them was in day care for almost 2 years. Since I'm not sure what you mean by not being properly attached, so maybe you can elaborate.
Just because I'm curious, where are your kids while you're here on the internet debating with me? Mine are napping, otherwise I don't have large blocks of time on the computer.
- candlemomma124
October 1, 2008 11:36AM
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I did not say that your children do not have manners
What I was saying is that it is irrelevant that a 2 year old has "manners." They have no comprehension of what please and thank you totally mean or what social "niceties" are. It's more important that children are intrinsically motivated to say these things. It is more GENUINE and honest when a child is enpowered enough to say these things on their own without adult intervention or drilling. This gives the child power to use these when he/she is ready and it is so much more joyful for the receiver when it comes truly from their heart.
Here are some links/information on improper and proper/secure attachments:
http://www.ag.ndsu.edu/pubs/yf/famsci/fs617w.htm
http://helpguide.org/mental/parenting_bonding_reactive_attachment_disorder.htm
I am sick today. My husband is with my kids at a homeschool park day:-)
- Iknowbetter
October 1, 2008 12:25PM
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OMG
Seriously you think a 2 year old is so dumb that they dont know thankyou and please. My 2 year old knew it mind you she went to day care at 26 months so after 2. She knew exactly what it was because she properly used it over and over without me prompting and yes I taught her that I didnt drill it in her head, i showed her by example when she did something for me or i needed her to do something. Similarly my 2 year old at 15 months understood concept of me counting till 3 to give her a chance to behave before removing her from situation and she time and again proved that she knew exactly what I was about to do i.e do a time out and after the first 2 weeks all i needed was show her my hand and count 1 and she immediatly knew she is trouble and stopped shoving her head and hands in places she didnt need to or run out of mall play area while children older than her were absolutely a nightmare. I think you are failing your own argument here. On one hand you are so strongly talking about how THEY know when they are left alone with daycare staff and the KNOW THE DIFFERENCE bewtween quantity and quality at suhc young age and yet they are so DUMB they cant understand what thankyou and please mean. You are really not serious???
Oh BTW when i did those things with my DD i was SAH. Keep in mind SAH is not enough to show you are loving mom, again quality and quantity just because you spend all day with your child doesnt mean your child is better off or you are doing a good job. The quality of time you spend with them is absolutely more important than mere quantity, I mean really if a child at 2 doesnt know thankyou and please and has no discipline strategy in place,has no sleep play routine, isnt mentally more astute than a same child in daycare I really dont think he is better than being a structured environment where some one can may be provide the tools he/she needs to build those social skills. Because if a mom is not doing what she is suppose to do, the child still needs to learn and progress. Loving parenting is not just LOVING, its loving and so much more, investing effort and time which cannot be measured by how many hours a week you are with your child but actually what you child is getting out of you in even may be 4 hours a day with you before bed. I am not saying SAH is a bad idea or unimportant, i am just saying not all SAH do quality time management all the time for the kids and it just doesnt automatically means those kids are superior to kids of WOH moms.
- Najma jay
January 23, 2009 10:17PM
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Your argument makes no sense and sounds like a rant
Kids know the feeling of security from a young age. They learn that love is conditional by adults asking them to perform like a trained seal or dog by using "manners." They don't grasp these developmentally until they are much older. It only makes the adult feel good and powerful to force a child to use this type of language to satisfy his or her won needs when a child is that young.
I hear how defensive you are and I'm afraid that anything that actually makes sense will be over you head because of how defensive you are. I think that if you really looked closely that you fear that what I've said is true and that then you'd actually have to make arrangements to do better for your children. Wouldn't want to do that, would we? Sheesh....
If we, the parents, won't advocate for the best for our children then who will?
- Iknowbetter
January 24, 2009 4:02AM
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And who made you child development expert
So now you are even against the fact that SAHM can do better than average with children. Listen and read carefully I was SAH with my daughter who at 2 could speak clearer than many 3 year olds in 2 different langauges. And no it is not about forcing children or empowering yourself. Do you not believe in reading to your child, because a newborn cant for sure grasp reading but its proven that early reading develops neuronal connections and enhances brain development and learning skills, similarly saying thank you to your child from young age is showing respect to that child as an individual and modeling at same time. That is what i did with both my kids, appreciated them and showed them to do the same for every one, hence at 2 she knew what to do, again i was SAH and now that I am not I do the same for my son, tell him thank you when he smiles at me. And there is nothing wrong with starting early, its actualy more human than being a dog contrary to your belief. Guess what my DD could tell me via sign language at 7 months that she needed to eat, sleep, more, milk, what she wanted to eat or was she cranky etc. Did yours? and yes it was empowering because i gave my child power to not whine and use a method to communicate when other children usually just cry. Again SAH and now i believe above average SAH, proves my point, that not all SAH kids get all they can specially when many moms dont even think they can do more with them. Its you who is defensive in your lack of knowledge about how children are sponges ready tp absorb and learn from parents. Now at 6 months we are doing the same sign language with him, i m sure with my time investment he will "GRASP" and start communicating rather than whining, even though i m not home 24/7 like YOU
- Najma jay
January 24, 2009 11:09AM
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(((hugs)))
I think you are an amazing mom. Don't let it get to you. You are doing all you can for your child and you don't owe anyone any explaination at all. He is your son, he knows you love him and you know he is A-okay....so thats all that matters.
- Najma jay
January 23, 2009 10:30PM
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Numerous Studies Show...
that children are the most independent are the ones that have a healthy, strong attachment to mom and secondary equal attachment to dad.
Being in day care interferes with babies and toddlers' ability to obtain a normal and healthy bond with his or her parents (the main caregivers). It is not uncommon for day care children to become more attached to their main caregiver in day care than to the parent(s). I've known people who have had this happen. Many working parents have complained of this "problem" when it would be perfectly normal for the child to become confused about who is the main caregiver in their lives. That is a Huge PRICE to pay for a parent's independence.
Children with unhealthy bonds and improper attachment are not as independent as children with strong attachments to their parents. There are many studies that have shown this. So to say that day care equals more independence is just an outright lie. Children are more secure and therefore independent, when they have a strong bond with their primary caregivers.
- Iknowbetter
October 2, 2008 8:04PM
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Again
My children have absolutely normal bonding with me, my older DD is indepent plenty for cryin out loud they are not dumb they know me, my son knows my smell, he knows I am the mom and he is not clingy, or whiney. he is a very happy smiling 6 month old who according to his teacher is such a ham that every one in the school wants to hold him since he is always laughing and smiling and is rarely fussy unless he is hungry and tired. He is the same way at home on weekends. My DD at 6 months was a handful (being my first baby i was so inexperienced) and i believe the difference in their tempraments is not because he is an easy baby but because I have more confidence this time around and I have managed 2 better than 1 even with working outside my home. Seriously stop trying to make a perfectly normal mom feel like her son is missing some "SPECIAL BOND" that you have with you children. I am sure she and her son are doing absolutely A-OKAY. It takes a lot of abuse, and neglegt to damage a childs pyche permanently for life. Just going to daycare b/c mom had to work doesnt damage the social dynamics of a society, otherwise in a few years most of the industrialized nations will be nothing but full of criminals and psychiatric adults since majority of moms now work so really we dont have very many so called "NORMAL" children anymore.
- Najma jay
January 23, 2009 10:27PM
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Wow Guilty much?
I'm laughing about your last comments right now because I think I read a recent report that over 25-30% of our adult population has some kind of diagnosible mental illness. That includes depression, anxiety, etc. A lot of these stem from childhood. I think "normal" in our society does not necessarily equal "healthy." And can you really answer the question that your children are better off in daycare then with you or their dad with a straight face? If that is the case, then you probably should not have had children.
- Iknowbetter
January 24, 2009 3:55AM
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YOu are such a piece of work
Go away some where with your high horse seriously, you are a psychologist too now. How many years in med school have you spent? And BTW it took me 4 years to concieve my daughter so for some one like you who has never dealt with infertility, PPD and SAH and WOH, at all any of those stop judging people. B.c i am sure those mental illnesses you talked about are a result of moms like you, thins kind of bullying can only come from some one so deeply unsatisfied with their life that they need to lash on women who are different than them. I can assure you myw orking wont harm my kids as much as your arrogance and bullying attitude will your kids. I am sure it shows in every aspect of your life. GO please enlighten yourself with struggles of average american. OKAY now go on. I have to go my kids are up but you please continue to stay home and ignore them while youa re on line cuz that is your BREAK lolOh and change your name, you dont know better for sure.
- Najma jay
January 24, 2009 9:57AM
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Wow! Your anger and resentment are astounding
Personal attacks are NOT an argument. I can tell that I ruffled many of your feathers and hit a direct artery (not just a nerve). I'm sure that going through infertility treatments are traumatic, but really what does that have to do with staying at home with your kids being better than day care? None of your arguments hold any water and saying that I'm online a lot and neglecting my kids when you are doing the same and you work is laughable. My hubby spends time taking my kids places, so I can relax once in awhile.
I see through all of your guilt and I feel sorry for you and your kids.
- Iknowbetter
January 24, 2009 3:15PM
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Hahahaha
Really who started the personal argument. And no IF was not traumatic for me at all, It made me stronger and thankful for the gift of my children. Mention of my IF was at the nerve of you to say I should have never had kids, at least mine will be open minded and tolarent unlike you.
My only problem with you is that you are trying to justify your SAH and bullying moms who dont or cant stay home. You are very lucky if you can and many women are not that lucky and to assume they are destroying their kids is as stupid and ignorant as it can get. You are right you have hit an srtery bc I absolutely cannot stand people like you who are so self righteous that they are blind to anything else. Lets see the only reason that you are so agnited by my replies are that I have told you point blank that i dont think just bc you are home your kids are not better than a working mom. Why not relax with hubby and kids, why be online maam.
Of course answer is YOU NEED a BREAK admit it or not.
You think assuming reading with kids and teaching them by example is laughable, good for you, i wonder what else you do at home other than underestimating the true potential of your kids, bc you keep saying they cant grasp stuff at blah blah balh stage...may be you didnt try hard enough b.c trust me if you are devoted to make you kids excel they will....:)
As for you feeling sorry for my kids, my dear feelings are mutual, I hope when they grow up, u relax a little bit and then learn to listen to them if they disagree with your POV.
I am happy to say I am angry bc ignorance makes me angry and you are being ignorant and nothing else.
Unlike you My kids spend time with both of us on weekend and I am only on when they are taking a nap only on weekends, i prefer to spend time with my family and not look for people online to try to make them feel bad so I can feel good for myself.
The bottom line is you are a good mom for your kids and I have no doubt about that and so is every mom who keeps them in for 9 months and goes through pains of waking up at nights and crying with them when they hurt but if i can give you one word of advice try to feel for women who have no choice but to work and I hope to GOD you are never in that situation where you have to work to keep food on your table so your kids dont go hungry....trust me I have seen such women and their pain doesnt lessen when people like you start judging them....
May be you need to get out of your complex and hate towards other moms and really analyze why you are so self righteous b.c many times that is a sign of frustration and unhappiness with ones own situation. I.e wow how do they do it all, work kids etc etc. I feel so much for you, you poor soul....how about that reality check...lol
I hope you can find peace with in yourself and her feel free to waste your time here while you RELAX and fume at the same time. I dont have time to waste with people like you cuz you will never change
To all working moms out there....keep your spirits up and dont let people who dont know your situations bug you, b.c all that free time on their hands this is the best they can do
Good luck IKNOWBETTER...what a joke...:)
- Najma jay
January 24, 2009 4:27PM
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Project much?
My argument never has waivered and I do believe that kids with a stay at home parent are much better off than with some underpaid day care shlep. I see that you believe that day care worker is equal to mom and dad in the level of care given to a child.
Telling mothers to keep working and put their own needs first is detrimental to children's basic attachment needs. And you are taking away more time from them by arguing how you are so right in putting your children in a day care. Your baby would much rather be with you, your husband or (the least) your family. These are the people who have the most vested interest in your child. No one else can hold a candle.
Good luck with all of your rationalizations, projections, guilt, and associated anxieties in dealing with your children. I'm sure our society will be much better off for them.
- Iknowbetter
January 24, 2009 8:56PM
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Negatives of Daycare
While interacting with other children and learning to share and engaging in creative activities can be very beneficial to a child there are some negatives. My younger brother was placed in daycare while my mom went to school to become a nurse and he absolutely hated it. The other children were not nice to him and the caretakers were not very good themselves. He often came home complaining of what the teachers did to him that day. So while the concept of daycare may be useful the reality may not be be as strong as the conceptual idea.
- LeeLee
February 15, 2009 3:26PM
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Daycare is Beneficial
Although it varies with individual cases, daycare is not always a horrible idea. As the article says, daycare allows for more interaction among children at a younger age, which promotes socialistic behaviors. Increased interactions can help the child later in life, especially if the child attends pre-school. From these instances, the child is not hurt because their mother works, but benefits from the introduction of things outside their home. Although the child may also be introduced to illness, the children are generally better off by their preparation for pre-school and grammar school. Interaction with others and the ability to not cling to their mothers are two resources children need for later in life.
- Natalie Marie
February 26, 2009 11:02AM
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Benefits to Staying at Home Instead of Daycare
While studies may show that children who go to daycare have an increased vocabulary and more advanced social skills than children who are not in daycare, it can not be assumed that a child taught at home could not enter preschool ahead of other children. I was read to at every meal before I attended preschool, and thus, I had an advanced vocabulary when entering preschool. This time also allowed me to bond with my mother and she also took me to see other children my age. So really,it would seem as though children at home with their mothers and chidren at daycare could easily enter preschool at the same intellectual and social level.
Additionally, not all daycares have a set curriculum. Some daycares provide simply an opportunity for children to socialize with other kids their age, while neglecting the opportunity to educate.
- Elle
February 28, 2009 12:02PM
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