Concerns About Socialization Have No Factual Foundation
Concerns about the socialization of homeschooled children have no factual foundation. Evidence shows that homeschooled students score as well as or better than traditionally schooled children on widely used measures of social development. One study found that homeschooled students substantially outperformed traditionally schooled students on measures of communication, daily living skills, socialization, and social maturity subscales, with scores at the 84th percentile compared to the 23rd percentile for the traditionally schooled students. Homeschooled students as a group also exhibit more appropriate social behavior than their traditionally schooled counterparts. For instance, one study compared the social behavior of homeschooled and traditionally schooled children, matched along demographic and socioeconomic lines. Using the Child Behavior Checklist of 97 problem behaviors, the study found that “the mean problem behavior score for children attending conventional schools was more than eight times higher than that of the home-schooled group.” Probable explanations for this include the increased contact between homeschooled children and caring adults and less time spent in unsupervised groups of age peers. Research conducted by the National Center for Education Statistics found that the top reason cited by parents for homeschooling their children (85.4% of parents surveyed) was a concern about the environment of other schools, such as safety, drugs, and negative peer pressure.
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When a Home Schooled child reaches college or the business world, they have not learned how to handle people who are bullies or brutish, They will have developed no coping skills in this area. When a child is over-protected they are not REALLY as socially adept as they'd like to think. Also, home schoolers do not experience "real life" encounters with others. In their rare social groups, it is usually with liked-minded families, they are nolt developing skills to deal with "outsides" and emotions like jeolouse , rivalry. etc.
cause that was a cruddy response.
If homeschool children are as snooty as their parents are about homeschooling then maybe that social aspect just took a dip into the stupid levels. Socially good persons are not snooty about where they learn from or how they teach.
Talking to others who do homeschool or students of parents...they're not really great with allowing other thoughts. As I can see here this is all YAY for homeschool which shows the lack of understanding why anyone would be against it.
Basically it's putting all your eggs into one basket. You're banking on any parent that wants to teach their child that they'll do it correctly or out of love. God, you don't know humans well enough.
Homeschooling is a perfect way to be an abusive parent and never, ever be found out. Soon that'll be homeschool problem. That it harbors the abuser. Probably already do. I guess that's socially acceptable. Their the parent, they know better.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
For ages 7 under this isn't so much of a big deal, but when you get to high school this gets to be a big issue.
You talk like you have no influence on your children unless you have them at home for the majority of the time. Obviously, You don't socialize during class at school, but it helps a lot in making friends, exchanging ideas, recognizing differences, and gaining life experience.
"I don't want my children to be hurt by others."
This makes me wanna punch people(namely the people that homeschool ). You shouldn't close box, and dump what you think your child should learn, and play with. It's up to the parent to help the child. Not brain wash the kid with your ideas, and experiences. We deserve to make our own decisions to a certain extent.
"There is violence , and drugs , and, sex ......and........EVOLUTION! *shiver*"
Well if your so scared your child would be so affected by these things, you, should probably consider what your doing wrong as a parent.
All your doing (if your child has no special needs I.E. retarded/mute/def/blind/other) is dictating your child's childhood without consult.
See what your child wants.
I am homeschooled, I go to homeschool parties (occasionally, there isn't to many around here.) and even then, they invite friends in their neighborhood, or people they knew when they were in school. they talk, chat have a good time, and I'm just casually lounging.
I go to church , but we left the one we had gone to for the majority of my childhood, leaving my friends behind, and church hopping.
It just seems like I'm being brainwashed with my parents ideals, with religion and of the sort. Since I have nowhere else to go I keep my mouth shut, and keep my idea's to myself for fear of more brainwashing, and solitude.
Don't get me wrong, I have good parents, I love them, they love me, and they have some good sound advice , but homeschoolinmg is just bollocks.
While we are "academic" homeschoolers (all my kids perform above grade level and are learning both Greek and Latin, among other things) we have plenty of time to be with other people. My kids play with schooled friends when school is out, go to dance classes, bell choir, Sunday School and youth group, we go to the museum and parks with our co-op, and they get to be involved in the day to day of shopping. My older two )11 and 9) volunteer at our church in ( respectively ) the pre school and the MOPS toddler room.
Given how often kids are told in school that they need to stop talking, I think my kids get as much social time as school kids.
Hmmm...my son has experienced the daily frustration of having to deal with the mis-behavior of other students in public school as well. The stress that he dealt with was excessive and unnecessary. Whether or not you believe that students should have to deal with this type of behavior to prepare them for the "real world" (and I don't think they should) - it is impossible to ignore the fact that something has gone wrong with the socialization in public schools. Children in public school are not only dealing with bullies inside the school, but are also being subjected to things like intruder drills and lockdowns due to "threats" in the area. These are necessary because of the type of behavior that is being tolerated in the public schools and are graduating this kind of behavior into our society. When my little kindergartner came home in tears because of the intruder drill which required her to hide under her desk in case a stranger came to get her...I knew that public school was not the ideal learning environment for her.
Has a home schooling dad, I take my daughter everywhere I go. She meets and interacts with my customers as I repair their computers. She knows every nurse that my wife works with and they all love her. How many PS kids can say they have ridden on a firetruck, police car{not in the back seat}, sailed on a sailing ship and met Joan Embery from the San Diego Zoo? She is introduced to at least one new person everyday.
And everyone that she meets says what a respectful young lady she is.
I bounced around schools as a kid a lot. I came across students in public schools, private schools, and home schooling. Kids homeschooled their whole lives were far less extroverted. It is common for parents to think they foster social skills. However this can only be done by exposure to as wide a variety as possible of people, personalities, dispositions, attitudes, etc etc.
Public schools are the best. Hands down. However, not all districts have quality public schools, which is one of our nation's biggest problems. Not all children will thrive under the same formula obviously, but public schools provide the easiest chance for a large exposure to different types of people.
Even if homeschooled children socialize with other homeschooled children, that does not compare. The fact is, 99%+ of students are in public schools. Think about it; when you finally release your homeschooled child into the wild, their lack of exposure relative to the vast majority of their peers will make them stand out, feel isolated, turn to drugs, or otherwise develop psychological disorders.
Private schools have the same effect. They are indeed social networks, but mostly isolated from the public background. There are psycho-social borders to be crossed when leaving a private school, and the transition is very stressful.
There are no studies done for this, but from my experience, home-schooled and private-schooled children have a greater tendency to develop psychological disorders. What good is an education if you can't use it properly?
Here: “Kids homeschooled their whole lives were far less extroverted,” you have a non sequitur. So what if they were home-schooled? Did that cause it? I don’t think so. Personality is mostly genetic and innate. One’s environment can influence it but cannot change it drastically. Introverted people tend to have more introverted than extraverted kids, who, with how wild and undisciplined public schools are these days, cannot thrive in them, and so many of these parents home-school their kids so the kids can have an environment conducive to learning. This isn’t true in every case, obviously, just a reasonable general conjecture.
Fostering social skills is teaching children proper behavior, such as manners, taking turns, and being respectful to elders. This is the natural job of parents. It is also the job of parents to protect their children. Children should not be exposed to the widest variety possible of people. If that were true, it would be a good idea to let them associate with vagrants, criminals, and the anti-social. Why not have field trips to prisons? Children should not learn social skills from whatever other children happen to be around or in the school. That is why I will not let my daughter play with the next-door children. They go around with dirty faces and clothes, strew trash around their yard, hang out of upstairs windows, play with gas cans, the 1½-year-old was allowed to roam the neighborhood alone or with a 4-year-old sister, and when their mother tells them to do something (usually more like whines), they laugh and run away, while she does nothing. This is the common sort of person my innocent daughter would be forced to interact with daily if I sent her to the city school. Home-schooled children socialize with other respectable children that their parents approve of, such as sports teammates, and with people of all ages with similar interests. They don’t develop the inability to associate with people of other ages, as public-school students usually do. When they encounter others, they act in a mature and assertive fashion.
Public schools are the best? Do you have evidence? Since the beginning of compulsory education, schools have declined, since the beginning of progressive education, quite steeply. See the book, The Deliberate Dumbing Down of America for reference. Here are some real tests to show how much better they used to be: http://www.digitalhistory.uh.edu/quizzes/highschool_test.cfm , http://records.viu.ca/homeroom/Content/Lessons/compexam.htm , http://skyways.lib.ks.us/genweb//ottawa/exam.html , http://www.eagleforum.org/educate/2004/july04/1910.html , http://www.kansasheritage.org/orsh/library/final_exam.html , http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/sats/where/1901.html . My private elementary school placed me in a reading class four grades too easy. If public schools were better than private, I would have been allowed to take the appropriate reading class when I transferred to the local public school; instead, I was placed at an even lower level, in a class I had just completed perfectly. If they were best, I could send my daughter, 3½, off to a public nursery school and be confident she’d get to continue practicing 1st-grade arithmetic and reading and that she would continue to be read things like Tennyson and ancient history. She’s doing all this at home and loves every bit of it. She’s being classically educated, and she wants to attend Oxford and become a mathematician. The public schools would not maintain this possibility. She would be placed in a kindergarten class being taught letters and numbers, when she learned those by herself as a baby. Problems like this never improve, just get exponentially worse, as the learning potential of a gifted student moves faster than that of an average student, while the curriculum moves at the pace of the below-average students. Her mind would utterly stagnate and atrophy.
When you say “leaving a private school,” do you mean “…for the day” or “…permanently?” My private school was not isolated in any way, and the only problem I ever had with leaving it was the problem the PUBLIC school gave me in class placement.
I think you are implying introverts are mentally unbalanced. They are no more so than extraverts. Am I, an introvert, schizoid? Well are you, obviously an extravert, histrionic? Of course not. Introverts are, on average, smarter than extraverts, and tend to make better scientists and artists, but extraverts are, on average, more socially adept, and tend to make better leaders and actors. And everybody is somewhere on a scale from total introversion to total extraversion. Where you are on it just means generally how much “alone time” and “social time” you need. All places on it are normal; even a complete introvert, like me, needs some companionship and social interaction, and even a complete extravert needs some time alone.
Actually, it's proven that environment affects a person just as much, if not more so, than genetics.
There ARE field trips to prisons.
And if you know that a 1.5 year old roams around alone you're just as guilty for you know and do nothing.
Not that I believe you anyway....
My son that was home schooled and then graduated from SD State has a jobs that only pays about 10 times what the average PS student earns. And none of our old home school group is into drugs. We keep in touch with them all. Some didn't go to collage but all are well adjusted and doing good. And he is 30yrs old now. Only those that are not taught to stay away from the dopers and losers, become dopers and losers.
Research has shown that government-run schools are actually MORE segregated than private schools. Around 40% of African-American children in the U.S. attend government-run schools that are >90% African-American. The percentage of African-American students here in CA who attend a highly segregated school is a whopping 87%!
Only 14% of white students attend a government-run school where at least three different races make up at least one-tenth each of the student population (for example, a school that's 80% white, 10% African-American, and 10% Asian would qualify).
I was very UN-prepared by the government-run school I attended for interacting with individuals with a different background. "Diversity" at my school consisted of 2 African-Americans, 2 Mormons, and 1 Jew, all of whom came from affluent families where both parents were highly educated white-collar professionals. Everybody else was either a WASP or a Catholic of European descent, again from affluent families.
My own kids are exposed to FAR more diversity in our local homeschooling community. I didn't encounter a single Latino/a, Asian, Arab, Buddhist, Hindu, Muslim, or Bah'ai during my K-12 schooling- but my kids have through homeschooling.
Regarding these quotes on the socialization issue:
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"...public schools provide the easiest chance for a large exposure to different types of people."
"..this can only be done by exposure to as wide a variety as possible of people, personalities, dispositions, attitudes, etc etc."
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Public schools don't qualify as "variety"--it is only ONE way of interacting with many people. This is not at all the same as interacting in a variety of social situations.
Homeschooling provides many different social situations that can be handled any variety of ways each directly pertaining to the situation at hand with the support of a parent nearby.
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"What good is an education if you can't use it properly?"
"...when you finally release your homeschooled child into the wild, their lack of exposure relative to the vast majority of their peers will make them stand out, feel isolated, turn to drugs, or otherwise develop psychological disorders."
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It always seems to be the public school advocates who say things like "releasing into the wild" and "going out into the real world".
My homeschooled kid IS in the real world. Right now. At the age of 9, doing all sorts of things with me--getting groceries, going to the city offices doing errands pertaining to taxes or permits, he's with me collecting seeds from the garden, hanging out with his 89 yr old grampa, being involved in 4H projects, all sorts of things. This doesn't even include the park days and playdates and museum trips, libraries or whatever we want to do that day. My child isn't cloistered in an artificial social set-up with no true responsibilities. His whole life pertains to things/events/people he can connect as to why they are important and fun and useful in his life.
This is the social education that I want for my child--one where he comes by it honestly. He won't have to be "released into the wild" with no experience in the "grown up world". For one thing--school does nothing to prepare a child for the "grown up world".
"There are no studies done for this, but from my experience, home-schooled and private-schooled children have a greater tendency to develop psychological disorders. What good is an education if you can't use it properly?"
Wow! I'd say the opposite is true. I see being institutionalized for 12+ years (public forced schooling) as being emotionally damaging. Homeschooled children not only get to socialize with many children, but they also socialize very well with adults too. Honestly, if you really had experience with homeschooled children, you would know this.
In fact, the evidence shows that homeschooled kids are better off. I don't know when or where you met homeschooled kids, but a far greater chunk of society homeschools today than used to. It isn't an isolating thing. The kids I know who were homeschooled but then transitioned into public school are doing fabulously well: they have a lot of self-confidence, they aren't nearly as subject to peer pressure, they're fitting in well and plenty extroverted. The homeschooled kids who have gone on to college do better; they're not finally out from under the thumb of an oppressive system and tempted to go hog wild drinking, etc. Homeschooled kids have much more maturity.
I have been astounded at the crummy behavior I've seen from public schooled kids. If "extroverted" means pushing other kids aside to get at the museum exhibit, water fountain, whatever, then yes, public school kids are more extroverted. But the homeschooled kids are actually at the museum to see the stuff and to learn, not to be let out of their cages for a few minutes. They're respectful to the other kids and to the adult staff. I have had museum docents chase me into the parking lot to comment on what a pleasure it was to have my group of homeschooled kids visiting. They like having kids who aren't running amok or calling them nasty names if they ask the kids to stop doing something.
Granted, my kids don't have a lot of experience getting shoved into lockers, kicked, or having their persons or personal property disrespected. They aren't street savvy -- yet. But they're not dumb and would probably figure out pretty quickly, should the need arise, what new skills are needed for surviving in a hostile environment. I am trying my darnedest to teach them well enough so that they will be able to avoid those environments if they want to. I went to grad school on the south side of Chicago, and as a suburban kid , I was still able to figure it out, even though I hadn't interacted with that environment previously.
I’m a 32 yr old man and for 15 or more of my years I know I wasn’t alone in having an unpleasant homeschooled childhood. Me and my sister were homeschooled our whole lives “by” our single mom. Who, was gone most of the time at work leaving us to read and study on our own and who would get too frustrated with us when we needed her to explain something to us. I went on to get a degree in computer information systems from the local 2yr community college. But I was so socially retarded, from being kept in an 18 by 70 foot trailer the whole of my formative years, that I would not engage people but wait for them to engage me. And freak when they did. Because of this I didn’t have my first girlfriend until I was 20, see was 16 and had this thing about talking to the strangest guy in the room.
On the subject of crazy eccentrics, my currant girlfriend is 19 and was homeschooled her whole life as well as her little sister and brother. I thought for the past two years that this family was kind of on the eccentric hippy side, but I now know it goes way beyond that. They really believe that things like Kinesiology a.k. Muscle Testing, Homeopathy, Reflexology, Iridology, Naturopathy, and a bizarre form of therapy called the Backman Emotional Technique are really real sciences.
"they're not finally out from under the thumb of an oppressive system and tempted to go hog wild drinking, etc."
I've seen the exact opposite of this with multiple homeschoolers. I knew one girl who was homeschooled and then joined the Army and went "hog wild" and ended up pregnant within 6 months. She wasn't ready for the world she found herself in.
If homeschool kids are "released into the wild" and have such horrible experiences with their public school peers, then what you're telling me is that the public schools teach kids to be intolerant and unaccepting of people that are different than them. You're telling me that public school kids learn to have an air of superiority about them. You're telling me that kids in public schools have the inability to socialize with people who are different from them.
As for exposure to drugs, if public schools are so full of drugs, that is yet another sign that public schools are a crap place for kids! If public schools are truly educating, why are these kids doing drugs?
You praise extroversion but what is wrong with being an introvert? I was in public school most of my life (with a stint in private school). I'm still an introvert. I will always be an introvert. I LOVE being an introvert.
The difference in the quality of schools doesn't seem to have much of an effect on the quality of socialization. I hear the same horror stories about what those kids are doing when they are "socializing" in the next county over, which has some of the highest scores in the state.
You keep saying "my experience" but offer no examples. You provide no basis for your statement that your experience is that homeschooling children have psychological disorders.
The problem with doing such a study on psychological disorders is the age old question of the chicken and the egg. Plus, who do you test? Many kids with special needs have comorbid psychological disorders. Since public schools are very difficult places for kids with special needs, many choose to homeschool. This could inflate the number of homeschool kids with psychological disorders, but the cause is not the homeschooling itself.
Plus, with what are you assessing a person's potential for psychological disorder? Your statement about extroversion suggests that a shy or introverted kid could have potential to be classified as having a psychological disorder when really they're just existing in their given personality.
I never mentioned exposure to drugs in public schools. I never said public school kids would ostracize others. Even if I had made those points, which I didn't, that is a case for cleaning up public schools. I was referring to the psychological impact.
Yes, being an introvert can be considered a mild psychological disorder. In many cases, people who are shy or introverted WISH they were not. Perhaps you misunderstand what I mean by psychological disorder. The introverts I have met, myself included, behave so mainly due to low self esteem. I would not say feeling bad about oneself is a natural state of mind.
I explicitly said that there were no studies regarding the occurrence of psychological disorders. However a larger percentage of my friends from private schools have sought therapy or pharmaceuticals or experimented with drugs, as opposed to my friends from public schools. That is just the way it is in my experience, I am sure it is different for others. Please read my comments more thoroughly before swinging your axe! You probably misconstrued 80% of what I said.
Studies have been done and books have been written on former homeschoolers who are now adults, including _After Homeschool: Fifteen Homeschoolers Out in the Real World_ http://www.amazon.com/After-Homeschool-Fifteen-Homeschoolers-Parents/dp/1931199302 They all show that homeschoolers tend to be better prepared for the adult world than public school children, because homeschoolers are more used to interacting with adults than public school children are.
Speaking as an introvert who graduated from a top public high school, I found the problems I had with low self esteem had to do with the fact that I went to public school, not because I was an introvert. The public school environment was not conducive to introverts thriving. Once I left the artificial environment of high school I bloomed. Homeschooled teens that I know have much more self-confidence than any public school teen I've ever met. This is especially true of the introverts, who have never been forced into an environment that does not respect their worldview.
My son was bullied on an almost daily basis at his public elementary school. He had sand thrown in his face.
My daughter had horrible things said to her by little boys.
This is not socialization, it's anti-social behavior. Is there any wonder why violence has risen in public schools?
The GOOD NEWS is that my kids now have the opportunity to have positive socialization experiences with a variety of people! My son takes Tae Kwon Do and my daughter is on a soccer team. They both attend a homeschool group once a week.
Mostly, I focus on how they socialize with each other and with me and my husband. Because unlike those kids at public school, we're together for a lifetime!
I'm sorry to hear about your children's public school experience. However, do you really want the exact opposite, a world in which they will never experience bad elements, negativity, hardship? Do you really think you would be as strong as you are today without encountering resistance?
All these experiences, good and bad, are absolutely vital. They must be had. The trick is to frame them into a perspective in which the child can learn from it, take the good, leave the bad. It is all part of the process. Removing your child from that process is uncharted waters. It may turn out great, but is it worth risking a lifetime of psychological stress?
Many of the things that happen on the school yard would be crimes in the real world. If anyone pushed me down and stomped on my hand they would be taking a ride to jail. That is how you handle those experiences. And the "lifetime of psychological stress" is caused by uncaring teachers that turn their back on the kids causing the problems.
Although I did have some really mean and abusive teachers when I was a kid, it's important to not blame the problems of school bullying on teachers. My son had some great teachers who were very happy and dedicated and they seemed to really love the kids, but school still didn't work for us.
The whole set up of school--how and why compulsory school started in the first place is where the problem lies.
Compulsory school was started to produce industrious workers and also to cleave the American Indian children from their families as a way to destroy their culture--a simplification for sure, but that's the gist. It was also invented in a time where kids were seen and not heard and not respected. This system of schooling is what we should dispel. We should NOT replace it with only homeschooling--not every family wants to---and of course they shouldn't have to, but we should seriously reform school as it is now.
However, who watches the play ground where most assaults happen in the schools? In my daughter's school it was the teachers. Why are they out there if not to check violence.
You are right schools were created to make the rich richer. I don't think everyone should home school. It is rewarding for those of us who make that choice. Schools could be run properly, we just have to get rid of trained teachers and go back to teachers that care about the kids. Teacher collages teach how to control and destroy a child's drive.
At least, remember that children have rights. Like the right not to be hurt at school. Children can't disagree with the teacher even when they catch them in a lie. This I saw for my self. It was one of the reasons we home school. I feel sorry for the kids that are forced to go to school.
really sorry that there parents don't care enough to live a lifestyle that allows that. Toys for adults cost too much for one income.
"However, do you really want the exact opposite, a world in which they will never experience bad elements, negativity, hardship? Do you really think you would be as strong as you are today without encountering resistance?"
This world that you speak of does not exist. There is no such world where people live without bad elements, negativity, hardship or suffering. In real life, a person has choices as to handling a certain situation. In school, an artificial setting, there is little escape from dealing with these things that you mention. I think strength has nothing to do with emerging from adversity and bullies. I think survivorship does. No longer being the victim allows a person to be a survivor. This has little to do with strength and everything to do with life giving you lemons and finding a way to make "lemonade." I think the psychological stress that you are talking about is a huge symptom that is happening now in our society that has been mostly public schooled.
You asked if I would be as strong today without the hardships I faced in school. The answer is no. I remember embarrassing childhood experiences that have greatly affected my present-day relationships. I have made so many decisions based out of fear, trying to avoid rejection that has plagued me (I was a shy, not-so-popular kid).
I'm making great strides. But I didn't handle the situations I faced in school very well at all.
I am working SO HARD every day to not pass that on to my kids. Even today, I realized I made a comment that was based on my insecurity about something my son did out in public - but was really no problem at all. I was worried what others think of us. Crazy.
Why do people get so worked up about 10 year high school reunions and impressing people they went to school with so long ago? Because it is so difficult to shake that need for acceptance and fear of rejection.
And I also struggle with following my dreams versus being realistic. I doubt myself so much because my education was only partially interest-based and did not build on my strengths. Instead, it exposed my weaknesses. 13 years of that is difficult to shed.
Very well said.
Public schools are great for enforcing conformity, lopping off the tall poppies, exploiting insecurities, and crushing fragile egos. If that is socialization, I think my children can do without it.
If your child has insecurities you should help them get rid of them. Instead of brainwashing them into your ideals and beliefs.
honestly, how do you expect for your child to grow up and have a family if the fragile egos destroyed and stronger ones brought up.
If your child is weak, you help them grow stronger. Don't protect the weakness of your child.
I don't know what makes you think I'm brainwashing my children , or failing to help them grow stronger. You appear to be arguing with some person you dreamed up in your head rather than me.
I also have to wonder what makes you think that sending children to cookie-cutter government schools is the way to protect them from being brainwashed or help them grow stronger.
We did try framing the situation. We took him to counseling, and put him in Tae Kwon Do. But without support from the school to put an end to the bullying, it interfered with his schooling. Instead of doing his work, he was managing his bullies. My son is twice exceptional (gifted + l.d.), has a speech impediment and is small for his age. He is often the smallest kid in the class. He looks 2 grades younger than he is.
The same happened with my daughter. She was teased all the time because of her friendship with a boy. They constantly harrassed her about having a boyfriend. She was in fourth grade at the time. The teacher tried to intervene, but the kids kept it up. This happened in her GIFTED class!
These situations put them in a position where they grow to believe that they have to remain in a bullying situation. But they don't. Adults have the power to walk away. But in school, you must remain in that position. You can't just get up and walk out of class without being punished!
I've taught my son a great lesson. Don't just sit there and leave yourself in a horrible situation.
Homeschool isn't perfect. We have plenty of conflict to deal with! But that conflict is more age appropriate. Most of the conflict is sibling rivalry - much of which comes from the fact that my daughter "did school" better than her brother. Now, I'm there when the conflict starts. I teach them how to treat each other properly. When they act up, I have them recreate the situation and conversation so they can learn better communication methods.
When they face conflict outside the home, we work on it together.
My son would live with a lifetime of psychological stress if I let him be subject to those bullies. He would believe he has to be a doormat to society. But he doesn't. His confidence has grown leaps and bounds. And he's LEARNING!
I do not believe socialization is taught in a classroom. Socialization is mainly taught by parents and this links back to the parental involvement argument. They are of huge importance in teaching a child proper socialization skills.
I've found that homeschooling has more opprotunity to socialize than school has. Sitting at a desk does not equal socialization. Getting together with other homeschooling families, having group activities, field trips, organize sports leagues, city programs all socialize our children.
Homeschooled children do not spend 7 hours a day in a classroom, they're active and out and about, which frankly is more productive in my opinion.
Do you really want your children to learn social skills from other children? With very little adult supervision? Do you facilitate appropriate social skills between siblings at home? Who do you think is setting the standards for appropriate social skills on the playground?
This is a public forum, not a place for juvenile remarks. Even more ironic, this is a debate about education, and here is a response clearly from somebody deeply lacking in it! Nobody wants to hear you spew hate, especially when I was giving a personal account of my experiences. Very low of you to embarrass yourself in such a fashion.
Anyways, as I said, it is different in others' experiences. "you my dear have lead a very sheltered life". That is the most ludicrous statement that I have read on this website, to date! I commented here specifically because my larger-than-normal personal experiences with the school system give me a better ability to give a reasonable response to a question like this than say, somebody such as yourself!
If you have something to add to the discussion, feel free. But until that point, try to think a bit more before you type.
You were speaking of personal experience.
My personal experience has been the only difference between public and private schools were the cost of the 'drugs' and/or 'therapy'. Here's an article to read: http://www.kcbd.com/Global/story.asp?S=7299330
There's many more articles in many more areas. It's a National problem. Would you like a few more?